Brad,
My older brother Terry, who is also blind,wouldn't touch Dad. He was
afraid that he would have nightmares. I'm glad that I did
though. It wasn't any different than touching a person who is a
sleep. It was very healing for me and I'm so glad that I followed
the Lord's leading in this. He was right, as usual!
Kathy
At 10:19 AM 1/19/2007, you wrote:
>Kathy,
>
>That was an awesome service. I can only hope that I can make such a
>difference in folks lives that there's so many to attend it is
>exhausting to those sending me off. Regarding the touching bit? I
>did the same thing when my brother died. I was reluctant to at
>first, but without the visual closure it seems silly standing there
>with nothingness. So I just padded his chest and said" Good bye
>buddy". Dead or alive, our bodies are just a physical representation
>of the person that lived or lives inside.
>
>Brad
>
>
>
>At 09:04 AM 1/19/2007, you wrote:
>
>>Hi Guys,
>> I wanted to write more yesterday and share with you all
>> the happenings surrounding my Dad's funeral, but I came home with
>> some kind of a bug and so I had to keep my message short and to
>> the point. It is no fun flying when you don't feel well. Liz and
>> I both just stayed in bed, for the most part and recovered. I
>> just wanted to let you know yesterday that I was home and safe.
>> Anyway, the events surrounding Dad's funeral were just
>> amazing! I just have to share them with you. God was so with all
>> of us. First of all, when the pastor came over on Sunday, to plan
>> out the funeral service we all had a great time swapping memories
>> of Dad and what a character he truley was.
>> Then, and I have no idea how the next part of this story
>> will fly with some of you, but I'll tell it anyway, because it was
>> healing for me, I began praying about having the courage to touch
>> my Dad in order to say goodbye. I felt as though the Lord was
>> telling me that this would be an important part of the healing
>> process for me because I wasn't able to say goodbye to him while
>> he was still alive. Finally I prayed that, if the Lord felt that
>> this was important for me, that he would arrange it so that I
>> could do it alone, since I had no idea how I would react. I
>> didn't even tell Greg about this because I thought that I was being so bizarre.
>> Anyway, our family was scheduled to have a private viewing
>> at 11:00 am. on Monday morning, which ended up being a very nice
>> thing, but anyway, Greg and I got going earlier than expected and
>> showed up arount 10:00 am. instead. We knew the funeral dirrector
>> pretty well because we used to attend church together when Greg
>> and I lived in the area. The funeral director came out to the
>> parking lot to express his condolences to me personally and then
>> he said, "Kathy, would you like to spend some time alone with your
>> father ahead of time?" I couldn't believe it, but there was God
>> preparing a private place for me in the midst of everything, so I
>> went in with the director and spent some time alone with my
>> Dad. I just kept stroking his arm and holding his hand. I
>> couldn't believe how easy it was once I got past my own
>> fears. What I hadn't expected was how I opened the door for
>> others in my family, especially my Mom, to reach out and touch Dad
>> to say goodbye after me.
>> The rest of the family gathered and we hugged and cried,
>> but rejoiced that Dad is at peace now. At around 4:00 pm. we had
>> a public wake and, O My Goodness, I couldn't believe how many
>> people showed up to say goodbye. The wake lasted three
>> hours. Our family formed a reception line and I honestly didn't
>> believe that there would be enough time for everybody to make it
>> through. It was incredible how many lives this simple man
>> touched. Our family had a kind of joke about it though. You see,
>> my Dad hated crowds. He always just wanted to get in and get out
>> and get whatever he was supposed to do over with. We were joking
>> that this was probably the only way that Dad could have handled
>> this situation, especially as the center of attention. GRIN! I'll
>> bet that there were between 2 & 300 people, easy.
>> Anyway, then, there was a military funeral. Wow, was that
>> powerful. All the V.F.W. posts in the Stephenson area
>> participated. It is a very moving service. First, they all filed
>> past my Dad and gave him a sollute. then, they read about his
>> military history and his obituary. When they prayed, they would
>> remove their caps and put them back on when the prayer was
>> done. Then, they began folding the flag and as they did so, the
>> chaplain explained what each fold of the flag meant. It was
>> really powerful. I was amazed at how much of the service,
>> including each fold of the flag, points to honoring God first,
>> above all else. Then, of course, they presented the flag to my
>> Mom, then Taps was played on a trumpet and then, the men retreated.
>> After that, they held, what is called a prayer
>> service. The pastor preached a sermon at this and there was a
>> time of prayer and then Greg and I sang the old Swedish hymn, "Day by Day."
>> After most of the people had left, Mom wanted to go up to
>> the casket one more time and I offered to go with her. She and I
>> walked up and this time, she felt comfortable taking his arm and
>> saying, "good night dear." It was very hard to keep from crying
>> as she did this because I knew that this was what she had said to
>> him every night, but this time, it was so final. We prayed
>> together prayers of thanks for Dad and for the life he provided
>> for us, with God's help.
>> The next Day, was the church funeral. I and two of my
>> brothers participated in that. I sang a simple song that Dad had
>> asked me to sing when he died. The thing is, he had asked me to
>> do this over 32 years ago. I also sang "Because He Lives," and we
>> got the whole church rockin' on the chorus. then, the cemetary is
>> right behind the church so we moved out to there, but the cool
>> thing was that the pianist began playing, "How Great Thou Art,"
>> and I started singing it and everybody joined in, so we walked out
>> to the cemetary, in 12 degree weather singing. Awesome,
>> eh? Seven of Dad's Grandsons were the paul barers. Matt would
>> have made eight, but he didn't want to do it.
>> At the committal service, I sang, "Thy Holy Wings Dear
>> Savior." The chill added extra vibrato to my voice, but I was
>> determined to at least give this gift, since I had not been able
>> to sing to him one more time before he left this earth.
>> It was just a powerful few days for me. Thank you for
>> letting me share. My mom is being amazing so far. I think that
>> all of us kids are so worried about her. We're constantly calling
>> her to make sure that she's okay and those who are close keep
>> dropping in. She has just been so strong through all of this.
>> I'll just share two more things, and then, I'll
>> close. Our church out here in Glenburn, on their own, sent
>> flowers to my family. That is incredible to me, that they would
>> reach out beyond their circle to show such honor to my Dad. I
>> can't tell you how good that made Greg and I feel.
>> Secondly, there is a Steve Green song called, "Find Us
>> Faithful." Some of the words in that song are, "After all our
>> hopes and dreams have come and gone and our children sift through
>> all we've left behind, may the clues that they discover and the
>> memories they uncover become the light that leads them to the road
>> we each must find." Well, when my Mom was going through my Dad's
>> wallet on Saturday, she found a little cross in it that says,
>> "Jesus Saves." She has no idea how long he had carried it or
>> where he picked it up, but this little cross was placed in Dad's
>> hands for the viewing and the burial. He had always had it with
>> him and he still does, but for a short time, everyone was able to
>> see the testimony that my Dad lived in deeds.
>>God bless,
>>Kathy
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