like kendall, i think some of the people are well
meaning idiots. their concept that God is punishing
someone by giving their child a disability is
completely at odds with my concept of God. i usually
take time to give these folks a sorely needed theology
lesson. they do not normally enjoy the lessons that i
give them. 

as to nursing or brestfeeding in the old days children
were not weaned until they were past 3 years of age
and that was if they had no problems whatsoever with
the alergic stuff you mentioned. i suggest you follow
kendall's advice. 

--- "Kendall D. Corbett" <[log in to unmask]>
wrote:

> Heidi,
> 
> I'd suggest that you have the exam without the
> social worker present
> at this point.  Let the PT and OT (and possibly a
> developmental
> pediatrician/neurologist) rule out any
> physical/organic causes for
> your sons delays first.  Then, if those are ruled
> out, talk with the
> social worker, or another counselor, as it sounds
> like it will be
> difficukt to build a good working relationship with
> this social
> worker.  He/she may have the best intentions in the
> world for
> mentioning possible psychological causes for his
> delays, but I'd think
> ruling out other causes first is a good strategy.
> 
> I'm not going to say whether G-d had anything to do
> with his delays,
> as I don't know what your faith life is.  I'm
> definitely not a
> Calvinist, so I'm sure your son wasn't pre-ordained
> to have the delays
> that he has.  After I was born, and later after I
> had my stroke,
> "friends" of my mother said that G-d was punishing
> her (or me) for
> things that had happened in our past.  That was
> definitely BS.  I will
> say that I learned things through my disabilities
> that have been
> beneficial spiritually, whether that is in my faith,
> or just in how I
> deal with those whose lives I touch, and whose lives
> touch mine.
> 
> On 7/23/07, Tamar Raine <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
> > Here's an idea. God is only an imaginary idea,
> like the tooth fairy,  it is people that run the
> world. sometimes shit happens, and it's nobody's
> fault!
> >
> > Heidi, that's a load of bs that it's your fault. 
> gopefully the exams will prove that, so you can
> begin to get him some help.
> >
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > Tamar Mag Raine
> > [log in to unmask]
> > http://www.zazzle.com/TamarMag*
> > www.cafepress.com/tamarmag
> > Lots of new art & designs ~ come and look!
> > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >
> >
> >
> > ----- Original Message ----
> > From: heidi tibollo <[log in to unmask]>
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Sent: Sunday, July 22, 2007 9:59:02 PM
> > Subject: Re: C-PALSY Digest - 20 Jul 2007 to 22
> Jul 2007 (#2007-136)
> >
> >
> > Hi all,
> > We have an early intervention assessment this week
> with a PT and OT to see if we qualify for help for
> our son with gross motor and possibly Speech and
> gagging issues. My concern is that the social worker
> will be there also. She alluded last week that my
> sons delays may be due to my "overcaring nature" and
> mothers sometimes are too concerned and hovering.
> Made my blood boil but I said nothing. Now I am
> concerned she may influence the PT and OT. Do I say
> something at the onset of the evaluation? Say
> something only if they say he doesn't meet the
> criteria? The social worker thought I should be
> introducing more foods and found out I am an
> attachment parent (co-sleeping and extended
> breastfeeding). My older son was very allergic to
> all dairy and eggs so I haven't introduced them into
> my younger son's diet yet and, hello,- he gaggs and
> doesn't seem to have any interest in chewing. My
> husband feels that I am responsible for our sons
> delays "too nurturing yet
> >  not engaging enough"-
> > his (and his mother's) explaination as to why my
> son has been globally delayed with motor and
> intellectual milestones. What do I say to this- do I
> want to be right, that my son does have some issues
> and prove my husband wrong. I would be thrilled if I
> was the reason for all the delays yet somehow I am
> hurt that he blames me. (to be fair he says he's not
> blaming me just pointing out what he thinks) Very
> frustrating.
> > Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
> > Thanks
> > Heidi
> >
> >
> > ----- Original Message ----
> > From: C-PALSY automatic digest system
> <[log in to unmask]>
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Sent: Monday, July 23, 2007 12:00:49 AM
> > Subject: C-PALSY Digest - 20 Jul 2007 to 22 Jul
> 2007 (#2007-136)
> >
> >
> > There is 1 message totalling 110 lines in this
> issue.
> >
> > Topics of the day:
> >
> >  1. GO-D FOOD FOR THOUGHT   PLEASE READ Are we to
> blame for our son's brain
> >     dysfunction? - Latest Questions
> >
> > -----------------------
> >
> > To change your mail settings or leave the C-PALSY
> list, go here:
> >
> >
>
http://listserv.icors.org/SCRIPTS/WA-ICORS.EXE?SUBED1=c-palsy
> >
> >
>
----------------------------------------------------------------------
> >
> > Date:    Sun, 22 Jul 2007 12:16:49 -0400
> > From:    Meir Weiss <[log in to unmask]>
> > Subject: GO-D FOOD FOR THOUGHT   PLEASE READ Are
> we to blame for our son's brain dysfunction? -
> Latest Questions
> >
> >
>
http://www.chabad.org/library/article.asp?AID=3D541123
> >
> > =20
> > Printed from Chabad.org=09
> >
> > Are we to blame for our son's brain dysfunction?
> >
> > Question:
> >
> >        My son was diagnosed with a form of brain
> dysfunction. Please let me =
> > know if his parents or grandparents did something
> to deserve this =
> > punishment. Should we blame ourselves for his
> illness? Also, how can we =
> > help him?
> >
> > Answer:
> >
> > I am sorry about your son's diagnosis. It can be a
> difficult time for =
> > parents to reach an acceptance of why things
> happened this way. Often, =
> > they will incorrectly blame themselves or fault
> themselves for a child's =
> > sickness.=20
> >
> > We do not know why G=E2=80=91d runs His world as
> He does. We do not =
> > understand why there is suffering, sickness,
> poverty, hunger or the many =
> > seemingly unfair challenges and tribulations in
> our world.=20
> >
> > We are told that sometimes very great souls need
> to descend to this =
> > world. These souls are so lofty that the physical
> realm cannot contain =
> > them, so they come into a body that "shatters"
> from its impact. Your =
> > son's brain might be somewhat dysfunctional
> because of the great holy =
> > soul that is enclothed within it. Many parents of
> special needs children =
> > vouch for this, explaining how despite the child's
> many needs, these =
> > children have a certain purity to them, or a
> certain power to them, in =
> > helping others to accept them because of who they
> are, not what they can =
> > give to this world, or to their families. Such
> children teach us the =
> > power of real love--a love that is not based on
> any preconditions.
> >
> > As far as your question if you did anything to
> "deserve" this: Special =
> > children are most often given to very special
> families, who can see =
> > beyond their external dysfunction to the beauty of
> their soul. No, I do =
> 
=== message truncated ===



       
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