Have a laugh.
Text of forwarded message follows:
>Congress Passes Americans With No Abilities Act
>
>WASHINGTON, DC On Tuesday, Congress approved the Americans With No
>Abilities Act, sweeping new legislation that provides benefits and
>protection for more than 135 million talentless Americans.
>
>The act, signed into law by President Bush shortly after its
>passage, is being hailed as a major victory for the millions upon
>millions of US citizens who lack any real skills or uses.
>
>Roughly 50 percent of Americans through no fault of their own do not
>possess the talent necessary to carve out a meaningful role for
>themselves in society, said Bush, a long time ANA supporter. Their
>lives are futile hamster wheel existences of unrewarding, dead end
>busywork: Xeroxing documents written by others, filling in mail in
>rebates for Black & Decker toaster ovens, and processing
>bureaucratic forms that nobody will ever see. Sadly, for these
>millions of non abled Americans, the American dream of working hard
>and moving up through the ranks is simply not a reality.
>
>Under the Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million
>important sounding middle man positions will be created in the white
>collar sector for nonabled persons, providing them with an illusory
>sense of purpose and ability. Mandatory, non performance based
>raises and promotions will also be offered to create a sense of
>upward mobility for even the most unremarkable, utterly replaceable employees.
>
>The legislation also provides corporations with incentives to hire
>non abled workers, including tax breaks for those who hire one non
>germane worker for every two talented new hires.
>
>Finally, the Americans With No Abilities Act also contains tough new
>measures to prevent discrimination against the non abled by banning
>prospective employers from asking such job interview questions as,
>What can you bring to this organization? and Do you have any special
>skills that would make you an asset to this company?
>
>As a non abled person, I frequently find myself unable to keep up
>with co workers who have something going for them, said Elaine
>Gertz, who lost her position as an unessential filing clerk at a
>Cleveland tile wholesaler last month because of her lack of notable
>skills. This new law should really help people like me.
>
>With the passage of the Americans With No Abilities Act, Gertz and
>millions of other untalented, nonessential citizens can finally see
>a light at the end of the tunnel. Said Bush: It is our duty, both as
>lawmakers and as human beings, to provide each and every American
>citizen, regardless of his or her of value to society, some sort of
>space to take up in this great nation.
End of forwarded message text:
John
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