I can't offer any advice as I know what you are going through first hand so
to speak.  I will say I understand how hard it is for you as a mother to
watch your son make the sad mistakes he is making and to allow him to make
those mistakes.  It take a special strength to do this.  I question my own
strength when it comes to allowing my own son the freedom to totally screw
up even though I know it might be the rite thing.  I will pray for you that
you might continue on in that special strength that only Our Lord can give.
----- Original Message -----
From: Karen Carter <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Friday, February 10, 2006 12:04 PM
Subject: Re: The latest from Chris


> Amen Kathy.  It is your love that can allow you to let him go through it.
It hurts to see him make the wrong decissions but you love him enough to
want him to learn and grow through them.  And like you say if you keep
rescueing him you are allowing him to stay in his ways and not grow.   So
you are a great Mother and doing what is right.  Helping your child to see
the real world and he will become a much better adult because of it.  Even
if he chooses to stay on the wrong path he will have the wisdom to survive
in the jungle instead of being eaten up.  I know my brother was the saem
way.  But I don't think Chris will stay on the wrong path all his life.
Because like says If you raise a child in the ways he should go.  He will
return unto it.  And Chris was raised in a christain home under the word so
he will eventually return to it.  Unfortunately my brother and I were not
raised in a Christain home.  And that is why he is still out their and I can
only pray to God that he gets saved before it is to late.
>
> --
> I would rather live my life as if there is a God, and die to find out
there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't, and die to find out there
is
>
> IN GOD WE TRUST
> Karen Carter  '74
> -KC- Ministries
>
>
>  -------------- Original message ----------------------
> From: Kathy Du Bois <[log in to unmask]>
> > Brad,
> >          chris can't come home.  Not yet.  He would be lucky if he
> > graduated from high school next year at the rate that he is going.  I
> > have an idea that eventually he will end up on the street.  that's
> > when I am going to need everybody's prayers for strength more than
> > ever.  What parent ever wants to see a child go through that;
> > especially when it would be so easy to rescue him from it, but
> > Proverbs warns us that if you rescue a hot tempered man, you'll just
> > have to do it again.  I want the cycle to break and that is what
> > keeps me going.  Besides, I have peace in my home now and I don't
> > want to give that up.  Protecting Caleb and Liz helps to give me the
> > strength to continue saying "NO!"  But also, my love of Chris and my
> > knowledge of what truly is best for him, is also a source of strength.
> > Thanks for praying!
> > Kathy
> >
> >
> > At 11:25 AM 2/10/2006, you wrote:
> > >Kathy,
> > >
> > >He is finding out his actions and decisions might be taken in stride by
> > >himself, but very serious by others around him. Personally? And this is
my
> > >own view, before I'd take Chris back, I'd not even consider it until he
has
> > >decided  he just can't stand it there no more, not one more day, let
him
> > >really feel why that is, the lifestyle, the value system, everything,
and
> > >then when he  has really had it, fed up to the gills? Then I'd  suggest
him
> > >looking at his budget and how he can fund an apartment of his own or go
in
> > >with some buddies on one, either that or learn to get along with Nikki
and
> > >family.  From all I've been exposed to in the saga of Chris' ventures,
> > >which no doubt there are tons I don't know, I really can't see how
Chris
> > >could possibly learn responsibility of independence and etc and to
respect
> > >his family and provision, without having to have learned that for
himself.
> > >This would be a great tool in getting him to the plate with  the bat
ready
> > >to hit the pitches life has given him and the  game he chose to enter.
He's
> > >got what four months until he is out of high  school? Provided he
> > >graduates... I'm not certain of your confidence in that based off your
> > >report of school. The long and short of my point is, take him back now
or
> > >even if he looks like he has made some changes, and based off your
passed
> > >recounts of his behavior, he'll be 25 years old and still living at
home
> > >hanging with the guys. Desperation creates innovation. How many times
in
> > >life have we been faced with very tough situations and decisions, many
of
> > >which had nothing to do with our own choosing, and it was working
through
> > >that situation which made us stronger and confident in life? Oh Lord,
> > >*looking upwards* don't take that as a plea for hard times for any of
us
> > >hahahaah. But it is true nonetheless. I am in the midst of such a
lesson
> > >with my son, but he is learning and showing signs of responsibility. I
> > >bailed him out once financially but not this time and he is forced to
deal
> > >with those he  deals with, the bank, credit card, etc. How can they
learn
> > >to appreciate the help they've been given if not had to fend for
themselves
> > >first hand. That is my 1and a half cents worth.
> > >
> > >Brad