Kathy,
I basically said what you said in your last message once about four years
ago. I had come to the end of my Christian life and relationship with
Christ, as I knew it, and I desired to go deeper and further. I wanted to
be where Jesus was. Not physically, you understand, but I spiritually
wanted to be with Him. I was already filled with the Spirit and had
experience many of the gifts of the spirit, yet I knew in my own spirit,
there was more; much more. Frankly, I did not know what I was asking that
night in that little Wednesday Bible study in the basement of that small
church. I remember how I felt, though. You wouldn't like the rest of the
story but I got what I wanted and now I know there is even more. No, there
is no price to pay because Jesus done did all that for us. Self, self
centeredness, and selfishness, all spiritually speaking, keeps us from
witnessing, knowing, and even feeling His presence. If we don't know His
voice, the feelings of his presence are rare. I know this is hard to
believe but this is not pride speaking; it is dying to self. Dying can be
very painful until the pains and hurts are healed by the Healer. I am still
struggling with my own question, too, Kathy, so don't feel bad. I have a
strange feeling that the answer is the same for everyone of us but I don't
know what that might be yet. I want to know, however. I'll explain why
later.
Phil.
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