Kathy,
It kind of reminds me of the scripture, "woe to those who call good evil,
and evil good.
Vinny
----- Original Message -----
From: "Kathy Du Bois" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Thursday, October 06, 2005 7:48 AM
Subject: Re: It has been a while


> Hey Peggy,
> The thing that blows me away is that the probation officer didn't
> object to Chris moving in with Nicki's family.  She'll take anything
> to keep the financial responsibility off her shoulders.  It really
> does come down to the bottom line like that.  Nicki's older brother,
> who is a month younger than Chris, will be released from the same
> correctional facility that Chris was at last spring, in
> December.  The brother was held there for two years!  I can't help
> but wonder what will happen when the two of them get together.  Nicki
> has had her own run ins with drug court and has had to pay fines for
> under age smoking.  She is Chris's main supplier of cigarettes, as
> far as we can tell.  I would think that the probation officer might
> be a bit discouraging about Chris moving in to this chummy family,
> but nope!  We come off looking like the crazy people for not wishing
> him the best.  I just get so frustrated!
> Kathy
>
>
> At 09:50 PM 10/5/2005, you wrote:
>>Kathy, it's great to hear what's going on with you.  I'd been
>>wondering how you were doing, and thinking that if you didn't tell us
>>soon, I'd ask.  I wonder if it would be good for Chris to live at
>>Nikki's house and experience other types of parenting, from liars and
>>drunks.  Then maybe he'd begin to realize he doesn't have it as bad
>>as he'd like everyone to believe.
>>
>>Hugs, and post when you can,
>>
>>Peggy
>>
>>At 01:23 PM 10/5/2005, you wrote:
>> >Hi guys,
>> >         Well, I've been quiet lately, haven't I?  Pretty good for
>> >me!!  "NOT!"  Actually, Ive been keeping up with the reading pretty
>> >well, so I know pretty much what is going on, but I either lack the
>> >energy, or the words to describe my life lately, so I just read about
>> >yours.  I guess I've just found it easier to remain a passive lurker
>> >lately.    If nothing else, this does show that I can be still for a
>> >season at least!  GRIN!
>> >         Ned and Vinny, you will be happy to know that I finally got my
>> >piano tuned yesterday.  Yea!   The humidity had done a number on it,
>> >but Greg also hadn't put it together correctly when he decided to try
>> >to check things out for himself lat summer when I began asking you
>> >guys questions about it.  Liz and I have been rassing him a bit about
>> >it, now that we know.
>> >         Two weekends ago, I was at a women's retreat in New hampshire
>> > where
>> >I was one of the music leaders.  At first, it appeared that I would
>> >be the only musician, but God does answer prayer and we did manage to
>> >get a worship team together before all was said and done.  It went
>> >much better that way.  Yea!
>> >         I finally heard back from the drama company about my skit on
>> > the
>> >parable of the four soils and they want to see it so I'm busy
>> >tweeking and polishing it and hope to get it in the mail by the
>> >weekend.  Of course, I'm still dreading the rejection letter as a
>> >result, but I'll never know if I don't try.  I'd really appreciate
>> >your prayer over this venture for me.  I feel as though I"m really
>> >stepping out in faith.
>> >         I'm also busy with my knitting.  I need it for peace of mind
>> > with
>> >everything that is happening around me.  I made a prayer shawl for my
>> >sister and am now learning a really complicated pattern for an
>> >afghan.  Well, It may not be complicated for people to whom knitting
>> >is old hat, but for me, I'm pretty amazed!
>> >         I wish that parenthood were going as well.  Our oldest,
>> Matt, is now
>> >employed at Holiday Inn on the housekeeping staff.  He likes it, but
>> >Matt likes everything.  What he struggles with is being self aware
>> >enough to know whether or not he is doing well.  He works second
>> >shift and he still doesn't have his driver's license, even after
>> >taking the test twice, so Greg still has to run in and pick him up
>> >and then, of course, pick up chris from Nicki's house along the way.
>> >         Chris has 27 days more to live with us and then, he is
>> out!!  We had
>> >a meeting with a social worker today and two people from the
>> >department of corrections to try to figure out where Chris will live
>> >next.  Of course, it would be easiest if he stayed here, for them,
>> >but even then, if he moved out, they aren't interested in helping him
>> >too much, especially with any funding.  The problem is that he will
>> >still be on juvinile probation for three months after he turns 18 so
>> >he will be ending up in some sort of a no mans land.
>> >         While Chris's outward violence against us has stopped, "he says
>> > he
>> >doesn't want to go back to jail), the passive aggressive stuff has
>> >increased.  Unfortunately, most passive aggressive behaviors don't
>> >break the law, just frustrate everyone else in the house hold.  He
>> >has urinated in a potted plant, stolen his brother's i.d. to try to
>> >buy cigarettes, stolen things out of our room, not to mention
>> >retreaved things that we had taken from him that he shouldn't have
>> >had in the first place.  He spends a lot of his time at Nicki's, but
>> >he has lied about us so much and undermined our character so much to
>> >them, that they think that we are real jerks to even want to get rid
>> >of him.  He is such an excellent liar and con, I almost feel like I'm
>> >living with the guy from the movie, "Catch Me If You Can."  The
>> >stories get so convoluted that we can't even tell what is up and down
>> >sometimes.  Other people, however, who don't know him well, like the
>> >people that we met with today, don't know that, or in truth, care to
>> >know that.  If they did take the time to know, they might actually
>> >have to act and as long as we are around, they have more pressing
>> >matters to deal with.
>> >         This family counselor that the courts hired to work with us
>> > wrote
>> >this really glowing report about how our family had improved
>> >dramaticly with his help; no doubt insuring job security for him and
>> >the agency that he works for.
>> >         You know, what is so hard is that this is all just so
>> >wrong!!  Nicki's parents have said that, if worse comes to worse,
>> >Chris can move in with them.  Her father claims that he can get Chris
>> >a job at the Home Depot, where he works, but this guy is a drunk and
>> >a liar himself.  Nevertheless, Chris is clinging to the offer, if
>> >nothing else works out.  The probation officer also recommended that
>> >we give Chris the bike of ours,  that he has been using since he
>> >doesn't have anything else for transportation.
>> >         I know that I don't know the end of the story yet.  I know that
>> >anything could change at any time, but this is a pretty low point in
>> >the story right now.
>> >         God bless everybody.  Hopefully, my life will settle down
>> again soon
>> >and I can be a more frequent contributor again.
>> >I love you guys and I appreciate your being there, always!
>> >Kathy
>>
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