Yoh know God honors your honesty and I believe Chris will know he is really loved because of it even if he is mad about it he will respect it and know he con trustwhat you tell him.

--
Christ is either Lord of all or he is not Lord at all.
Karen Carter '74



> Well guys,
>         Thank you for the advice.  My inttention was to follow the wisdom
> offered
> here and wait to talk to the therapist.  Unfortunately, it didn't work out
> that way.  Chris came in this morning as I was reading my email.  I don't
> know if he saw anything, but he asked me point blank if I had heard
> anything interesting on the phone lately.  I paused for a moment and then
> decided that honesty is the best policy so I said, "yes."  He asked me what
> and I said, "I love you very much christopher."  Then he started getting
> angry.  I think that he thought that I was dodging his question, but I got
> up  and asked him to come with me to talk to Greg.  When we got into my
> bedroom, I told Greg that Chris had asked me straight out if I had heard
> anything interesting and Greg agreed with me that we should just tell the
> truth.  We asked to see Chris's wrists.  At first he resisted, but he
> finally took the bandage off.  It is four small cuts.  We talked to him
> about the point that this isn't the way to handle frustration or
> disappointment and we asked him to talk to his therapist about this next
> week.  He said that he would, but of course, we'll still be giving the
> therapist the heads up as well.    What a time to go on vacation!!
>         Chris is  angry at the invasion of privacy.  I understand this, but we
> have also tried to explain that we believe that we must do some monitering
> for safety reasons.  If he would repent and start making smarter decisions,
> we wouldn't have to do this, but as long as we are responsible for him, we
> want to know what he won't tell us.
>         93 days and he turns 18.  This next Tuesday, we are going to review a
> contract with him, with the help of a court ordered  family counselor
> concerning what we expect if he is to remain here, especially after he
> turns 18.  I rather doubt, at this point, however, that he will.  Where he
> will go, I don't know, but our family can't keep going through this craziness.
>         I know that, from my messages, you guys probably have a hard time
> figuring
> out whether life is better or worse for our family.  Well, every day is
> different.  Sometimes its okay and sometimes, like today, it is worse, but
> it sure isn't a picnic.
> Kathy