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Subject:
From:
virgie underwood <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Echurch-USA The Electronic Church <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Thu, 9 Jun 2005 20:25:09 -0400
Content-Type:
text/plain
Parts/Attachments:
text/plain (205 lines)
Hi Vicki,
Thanks for sharing this with us.
They are precious and adorable.
Blessings,
Virgie At 07:47 PM 6/9/2005, you wrote:

>Here's a few cute ones for you.  Maybe you've already seen these.  But if
>not...
>
>
>
>
> >
> > > A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's
> > >
> > > name?"
> > >
> > > One child answered, "Mary."
> > >
> > > The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?"
> > >
> > > A little kid said, "Verge."
> > >
> > > Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?"
> > >
> > > The kid said, "Well, you know they are always talking about Verge n'
> > >
> > > Mary.
> > >
> > >                                  ***********
> > >
> > >                                KIDS IN CHURCH
> > >
> > >                              3-year-old, Reese:
> > >
> > >                         "Our Father, Who does art in
> > >
> > >                          heaven, Harold is His name.
> > >
> > >                                    Amen."
> > >
> > >                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >                      A little boy was overheard praying:
> > >
> > >        "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it.
> > >
> > >                    I'm having a real good time like I am."
> > >
> > >                        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >           A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments.
> > >
> > >                   They were ready to discuss the last one.
> > >
> > >            The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was.
> > >
> > >                Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted,
> > >
> > >           "Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife."
> > >
> > >                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >            After the christening of his baby brother in church,
> > >
> > >          Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car.
> > >
> > >               His father asked him three times what was wrong.
> > >
> > >                           Finally, the boy replied,
> > >
> > >               "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a
> > >
> > >             Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."
> > >
> > >                         ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > > I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's
>Prayer
> > >
> > >                       for several evenings at bedtime,
> > >
> > >             she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer.
> > >
> > >                       Finally, she decided to go solo.
> > >
> > >               I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated
> > >
> > >                 each word right up to the end of the prayer:
> > >
> > >                  "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed,
> > >
> > >                         "but deliver us some E-mail.
> > >
> > >                            ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >                    One particular four-year-old prayed,
> > >
> > >                       "And forgive us our trash baskets
> > >
> > >              as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
> > >
> > >                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >    A Sunday school teacher asked her children, as they were on the way
>to
> > >
> > >                                church service,
> > >
> > >               "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
> > >
> > >                        One bright little girl replied,
> > >
> > >                             "Because people are
> > >
> > >                                  sleeping."
> > >
> > >                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > > Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting
> > > together
> > >
> > >                                  in church.
> > >
> > >                   Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.
> > >
> > >                    Finally, his big sister had had enough.
> > >
> > >               "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church."
> > >
> > >                  "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
> > >
> > >               Angie pointed to the back of the church and said,
> > >
> > >                   "See those two men standing by the door?
> > >
> > >                               They're hushers."
> > >
> > >                          ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >        A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5 and Ryan
>3.
> > >
> > >         The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.
> > >
> > >             Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.
> > >
> > >                  "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say,
> > >
> > >             'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'"
> > >
> > >      Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
> > >
> > >                     ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >                     A father was at the beach with his children
> > >
> > >                   when the four-year-old son ran up to him,
> > >
> > >                  grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore
> > >
> > >                     where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
> > >
> > >                 "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
> > >
> > >                  "He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
> > >
> > >                      The boy thought a moment and then said,
> > >
> > >                        "Did God throw him back down?"
> > >
> > >                      ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> > >
> > >         A wife invited some people to dinner.  At the table, she turned
>to
> > >
> > > their six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the
> > > blessing?"
> > >
> > >                 "I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
> > >
> > >              "Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.
> > >
> > >      The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I
> > > invite
> > >
> > >                         all these people to dinner?"
> > >
> > >
> >
> >
>
>
>
>--
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