Well Ned,
         Thanks for the prayers and encouragement.  Unfortunately, Matt did
miss his flight last night.  Hopefully, he is winging his way homeward as I
type.  It's another long story, but I pray that he gets himself together
enough to make it today.
         Our meeting today about Chris was a posative one, I think
anyway.  It looks like the court is considering either letting Chris come
home, beginning personal therapy, continuing family therapy and, we are
insisting that he continue meeting with the prison chaplain also, but we're
not sure how to work that out yet.  The other option for Chris is a
theraputic foster home.  They don't want to use the group home option right
now because he could pick up more bad ideas rather than benefit from the
structure provided.  Of course, in either case, he's got some heavy duty
probation coming and we still have no idea whether he will have to serve
time.  That is up to the judge and the probation officer and, of course,
the judge was not there today.     Also, if Chris comes home, we are going
to try to connect with the youth minister at Calvary Chapel.  His grand
parents attend our church.  He's a good guy, but Chris needs to be making
posative connections and get away from these bad habits and decisions that
he is forming.
         We're still waiting to hear about our appeal for a court appointed
lawyer, but Chris really needs to talk to somebody on a legal basis pretty
soon.  Please pray for him as he has to decide whether to plead guilty or
not.  Everyone is advising him not too, but when he talked to us last
night, he feels, and we agree, that pleading not guilty would be like lying
and he doesn't want to do that.  I guess that for legal reasons, that I
don't understand, it is better for him to plead not guilty and then go for
plea bargaining, but he really needs a lawyer to help him lay it all out
and weigh his options.  Even though we are the parents and have a strong
desire to advise, we are also the plaintiffs and we need to stay out of
this decision making process because it would affect the guilt or innocence
of a defendant in a criminal case, which could have life long effects on
his future.  We're all so knew to this.  Right now, the chaplain can talk
and advise, but he is not a lawyer.  We're praying that, whoever Chris
gets, it will be someone who will work well with Chris and will not be
interested in just working the system, but will be concerned for chris and
what is morally best for him.
         Part of the decision about whether Chris will be allowed back in
the home will also be determined by what child protective services
decides.  I've let it be known that, in no uncertain terms, are Caleb and
liz to be taken from our home.  They are totally innocent in all of this
and they are not to be touched.  I was very firm about  this to everyone
this morning, including Christopher.  Honestly though, I think that Chris
agrees with my position.  His problems are with us.  He doesn't want to see
his brother and sister get hurt.  He has even said that he'd be willing to
go elsewhere if that would protect Caleb and Liz.
         Oh, just one more thing about Chris, we've been getting very
posative reports from the prison staff about him.  He has been encouraging
bible study and one of his block mates reported to his own social worker
that Chris has been a very posative influance on him and has given him a
lot to think about.
         The secretary that attends our church, who works at the prison
told us last night that we are a very unique family situation.  Most
families in our position don't even want to bother with their wayward kid
any more, but the fact that we continue to visit and write and maintain a
relationship and are willing to consider trying to place him back in our
home makes us very odd.  That is so sad.
         It's not going to be smooth sailing.  It hasn't been for a long
time.  When Chris turns 18, in five months, there will be a whole new
kettle of fish to deal with, if he is even here at all.  There is so much
that we don't know, but I've handed it all to Jesus.  I've prayed that
Chris would be treated fairly and that the best would happen for his growth
in Christ.  Just keep praying guys.  It ain't over yet!
Thanks!
Kathy



At 05:27 PM 5/17/2005, you wrote:
>Kathy,
>I know this is a lot on your plate at one time.  I pray that Matt arrives
>home on time and safely.  Also, I pray that God will bless you meeting with
>the chaplain and your meeting with Chris.  You and Greg will not be alone.
>I know that your entire echurch family will be with  you in spirit and in
>prayer. Stand firm, lift your hands in praise to the Lord and He will lift
>you heart and spirit and give you the desires of your heart as you
>faithfully serve Him.
>
>God's love and peace be with you,
>
>Ned