I heard this story of a man and his 17 year old son who took to the water
in search of some father-son bonding time, and   fish action on the lake
which they could look back on having  had a good days fishing and such
unbelieveable stories  as having caught the big one and how it got off just
as it was reeled up to the boat. The last outing was a bit shamefully
stressed due to dad's impatience birthed out of a real desire for things to
go perfect for the son's father/son fishing experience, and dad was bound
and determined this time to not let anything which didn't go just right
bother him  and spoil the day, so smiles and fun is the menu for the day
.  Prior to the day they had looked forward to all week, they headed to the
sporting goods store and checked out some new baits, made some treasured
purchases.  Dad enjoying guiding his son into some artful purchases in the
sport, and his son spending some of his hard earned money outfitting
himself with a new tackle box, tackle, fish pliers, knife and all the
necessities, an outfitting he can call his own. Then the big day came and
fishing and bonding was all that was on the agenda. These two  took a
leisure start of the day as they planned on fishing until dusk, so
once  the gear was loaded, the canoe atop the vehicle, electric trolling
motor, battery, fishing poles, tackle loaded  and all the fixings for a
whale of a time were set and ready, they headed off to the lake about an
hour and a half away. After arriving getting things settled, the trolling
motor hooked up and raring to go, off they putted nice and quiet in search
for lily pads, fallen trees and boat docks which prize bass love to hang
out under. Time went on and fishing was not the best but they caught a few,
only one keeper at this point, but the dad was just happy with his son
having caught the first keeper and  spending time with his son, and the son
I'm sure with the father, but of course son wanted action.   Soon however,
he found himself in more action than he had hoped for. Dad, as he had all
day, moved from sitting on the cooler to the seat according to the
direction of the cast and to give his legs a bit of a break from the low
canoe seats, this time had found himself in mid stride when balance was off
with a slight rock and kaploosh. Before he knew it dad was swimming with
first thoughts of wondering how he would get himself back up in the canoe,
as canoes, as just exampled, sometimes are not easy to stay in let alone
climb back in, but in that split second which he was having that thought,
he noticed the canoe was not upright, cooler, tackle boxes floating and the
canoe sticking out of the water like a freight liner going down  head
first. Dad immediately started to call for the son to insure he was OK, and
the son doing same for the Dad. After a moment or two of commotion and now
insured both are OK, they hang on a floating cooler, and the half sunk
canoe which would normally float but the marine battery and the trolling
motor  lay at the bottom at the other end of the canoe. Luckily the water
was less than 16 feet as  a quarter of the canoe stuck out of the water to
help them hang on. Trying to negotiate how they would get everything back
to the launch an eighth of a mile away and through myriads of lily pads,
they thought to try to swim to shore 50 to 75 feet away to the nearest
shore but entering weeds with flailing legs is not good. Soon a man came by
with  a little boat, what was left of the gear, life jackets which were
floating next to the cooler,  and one tackle box was tossed in the man's
boat, and then the son, then the dad went aboard. Pulling up the canoe
enough to remove the 70 pound marine battery, and hopefully a trolling
motor still attached, soon they were on their way to the dock area holding
on to a half filled canoe. After they loaded all the stuff back in the
vehicle and started for home, dad began to think about the occurrence.
After having thought a good pity party to himself about how he blew it, a
perfectly good bonding time with his son, to show him a good time fishing,
and cause he was so stupid, such a loser  to flip over the canoe, "How
would he get his son back on the water now?" he thought. The hour and a
half ride home was pleasant, slight joking, and of course dad was thankful
that his son was not hurt or worse by getting caught by the trolling motor
and plunged with it to the bottom of the lake, or not being able to get the
fishing line off that had wrapped his son's feet  together when they waited
for the boat to arrive. All sort of things began running through his head.
Then he noticed something.  He noticed  something in his son that he
wondered if the tables were turned, if he, the dad, would have reacted the
same way. Dad noticed that although  it was his fault for the tipping, the
son didn't flinch a bit at the loss of most of his tackle he just bought or
his pole or anything. The son said virtually nothing. Sure there was a
comment in the heat of things after safety was assured and hanging on
to  the cooler about the expense of the sport and no more, but no anger and
dad for having flipped the canoe. Dad began to see that had his son flipped
it over, and once safety had been insured, he had difficulty seeing as much
grace and disregard for lost property and could see some rebuke afterwards
in attempts to make himself feel better after his losses, all at the sons'
emotional expense. This realization not only hurt intensely but it also
gave a new level of respect for his son, and for him, the dad, to look at
things much differently. Compelled to show his son that lessons can be
learned even in such times as these, he touted to his son... "You know? I
learned something today." And before dad could tout his lesson his son
said... "Yeah I did too. I learned that I'm not selfish.  Some tell me I'm
selfish but all I could think of was that you were alright... nothing else
mattered". Dad was taken back by his son's foresight in pondering more than
his losses again but a lesson to be learned of integrity and etc. Father
and son stood in agreement in regard of personal safety, but dad admitted
to his son that after the fact of all being OK, and safety is secured and
things are alright, the his son taught him  a lesson in grace and not
blaming dad for losing his stuff. He held no regard for the loss to spare
the expense of dad's mistake, which dad could honestly say he doubted
that  towards his son had it been his son's mistake. A lesson which brought
dad nearly to tears in thinking of it, and if pondering on it much more no
doubt would do just that .

If you haven't guessed by now this story is one I heard myself rambling
through my head on the drive back today as I sat in soaking wet clothes and
a gracious son who I am very, very  proud. And hopefully after I replace
all his equipment, he'll help me pick out a small boat which is flat
bottomed and meant to fish out of and once again brave the water, and keep
the canoeing for paddling  leisurely.

Brad


Brad

   Do not change your theology to accommodate a tragedy