Helen,

You wrote...

>Is the marriage between unbelievers in Christ still a union of man, woman,
>and God?

Unless God is in the hearts of the two, I don't believe so. There were
undoubtedly many people married under a false god, and that too is not more
a holy union than simply using a church to marry with Christ absent from
their hearts, in fact, that might even be worse come to think of it.

You also wrote...
>And do you believe that drugs, alcohol, and abusive behaviour are not
>reasons for divorce, even in a marriage that is that union?

Well I suppose technically, when Jesus said what god has joined, let no man
put asunder, technically if he was not part of the ceremony or part of the
union, then it is beyond my reasoning and not for me to judge. I suppose
not, but if the two, or even one, has come to the acknowledge of Christ,
then I believe, myself, that they are to try to work it out. As I mentioned
infidelity was mentioned by Jesus as a possible reason to divorce, and in
just about any drug, alcohol, or abusive situation, you'll find an
infidelity case I'd guess. Good questions. That is just my view, and
interpretation of the word concerning the matter. I can only hope it lines
up with the truth, but I'm no judge to determine that.

brad




>Helen
>
>At 08:42 PM 1/17/04 -0600, you wrote:
> >Mat,
> >
> >Watching divorce is indeed tough. Sometimes yes we can see how one spouse
> >mistreats the other, and so we can justify it somewhat in our minds, but
> >that in the end, still does not make it right. Marriage, and the
> >consummation there of, is  so very powerful  and people are unaware. The
> >physical union of man and wife goes much beyond what many reduce to a
> >physical act. When that is forsaken, there is damage. And when we threaten
> >divorce, we are willing to give that gift to each other away, that hurts
> >deep. I'm not certain there are comforting scripture regarding witnessing
> >the ruin of another's marriage, but we can stand strong knowing we value
> >God's word... like "What God has enjoined, let not man put asunder", and
> >our directive from God to love and honor our wives and etc. It is funny
> >when most people get married, they get married before God, and when they
> >divorce, they divorce before a judge. Have they not considered that
> >marriage is not just a union of two but of three? God, man and wife.
> >Another thought that helps keep things in perspective is looking at your
> >wife, I guess that would be figuratively with us lol, but looking at our
> >wives and know that they are God's daughters. Now. That demands a bit of
> >respect, even if they act like spoiled kids once and a while lol. We do as
> >well when given the chance, and even when not given but take the chance
> >hahaha. The problem people have with marriage, is they think it is all
> >butterflys and  flowers and when it is not, they get upset and they are
> >appalled they actually have to put some work in the marriage to keep it
> >going. I had one cousin that was married three months, and another a
> >wopping one month lol. What did they expect that they quit so early? They
> >didn't even give it a chance for criminy cripes sakes alive. Fear,
> >selfishness and discontentment are major logs on the fire of divorce. What
> >is in it for me? Or I've been doing this and getting nothing in return. It
> >is a growing union of honor and trust, and if it is broke or damaged it is
> >time to find out what went wrong and fix it, not quit as if it were a video
> >game and we can start over with a new game tomorrow. What problems arise in
> >a divorce often times carry on to the next marriage, and unless things
> >change there will be another divorce. Sometimes drugs or alcohol or abusive
> >behavior is involved and it is dangerous to remain in  a marriage. I
> >believe that to be somewhat different, and  that is difficult to handle.
> >Jesus said though for only one reason would there be excusable reason to
> >divorce and that was infidelity. Anyway. I guess all one can do is pray and
> >encourage and counsel those who will be open to it, to try to make a
> >difference in their lives.
> >
> >Brad