Hi Guys,
Yep, you’ve got it. We had to call the police last night and we are
pressing charges of criminal mischief on Christopher. Since it’s a first
offence, it may not mean much, but it is a huge hurtle mentally for us to
have to go this far in the disciplining of our son. When Dobson said that
parenting isn’t for cowards, he wasn’t joking.
Chris came home from school yesterday; still not quite sure of how much
we knew about what he had done the day before. He also wasn’t sure about
whether or not we knew about the magic cards. The first thing that he did
was go to his room to see if he had just misplaced them. Then he came
down to our room and asked us if we had been in his room. Greg told him
that he had gone in there during the night. Chris asked if he had taken
anything and Greg told him that we had taking the magic cards. Then, we
told him that we wanted to have an adult conversation about this
situation and how he handled that conversation would determine how
serious his punishment would be. Well, Chris wanted to have the
conversation right then and there, but we refused and said that we wanted
to have it up at church.
Finally, the three of us got into the car and went up to church. Chris,
however, would only say that he wanted his cards back. He wouldn’t talk
about his lying, his disobedience or anything. Then, we found out, from
Christopher, that his older brother Matthew, whom we had trusted, had
known about Christopher’s little escapade the day before and had given
him money so that Chris could pick up a pack of cards for himself as
well. It was like a double blow. Well, basically, Chris did not control
himself very well so we ended up getting back in the car and coming home.

When we got home, of course, first we called Matthew in and he confessed
to his part in the whole mess and handed over his cards as well.
Fortunately, Matt felt pretty guilty for the whole mess and stayed in the
room as a witness to everything that followed.
We had told the boys at the beginning of the week, that we weren’t really
crazy about this game, but we also admitted that we didn’t know much
about it so we had told them to wait until we could do some research
before we made a final decision on whether or not they could have these
cards.
The game is called, Magic, the Gathering, by Hasbro, and we are having a
lot of trouble finding Christian reviews. We’ve been to Crosswalk, but
they have stuff mostly about Pokemon, but this game seems a lot more
serious than that. The boys don’t think so. They think that it’s just a
different form of chess, but the cards have little sayings at the bottom
that the boys insist means nothing, but it just has to get internalized
somewhere along the path.
Anyway, Chris went behind our backs by riding in another boys car without
our permission and getting the cards so we stuck to our guns that he
wasn’t getting them back and he started smashing the wall and the door of
our room. That’s when we decided to call the police.
Chris thought that it was a joke so he just left our room and went to sit
in the living room and began making taunting remarks about how the police
were too slow and how, he could have murdered us all by now and could
have been half way to Bangor before the police arrived.
Also, Our church treasure is a secretary in the prison system. Her name
is Priscilla. She actually works in the youth detention section. How’s
that for God’s providence. Anyway, we’ve called her in the passed for
advice. For example, we called her the time that Chris took off on Matt’s
bike, to find out at what point we should call the police to report a
missing person. She’s been really helpful and supportive to our family
and, she’s the one person in the church that Chris genuinely likes. So,
we called Priscilla and she came from work to be with us.
The police arrived first and came into our bedroom to talk to us and
explain our options. He took pictures and he said, I am willing to write
a court summons, but I want to know, will you go through with it. I
basically said, If we’re willing to hold on to these cards and be willing
to go through all this, I hope that it shows that we are parents who will
follow through. So, he took the pictures of our, lovely, bedroom and took
down the facts. Then, he took Chris out to the car. He made him empty his
pockets and everything. Poor Liz and Caleb were pretty scared. Priscilla
arrived while Chris was with the policeman.
The policeman had suggested finding a place for Chris to go for the night
away from the house because he had threatened to do more damage.
Priscilla was willing to take him, but when Chris came back in, he just
went to his room. The policeman stayed while Greg went down and asked
Chris if he would like to go to Priscilla’s house for the night, but
Chris declined.
Finally, the policeman left, after giving us a court date of March 23.
Priscilla stayed for about an hour. We’ve given the cards to Priscilla to
hold on to for now. AT first, we just wanted them destroyed and it may
still come to that, but we still want to know more. Also, they may end up
becoming a teaching tool. WE were talking to another mother yesterday who
attends our church and her boy also plays this game and she thought it
was harmless. I guess that her boy has some cards with good characters on
it. Wait until she sees the ones Christopher picked out. Actually, to be
fair, I don’t know if you pick them out or if you just get a deck, not
quite knowing what all is inside. I know that with Pokemon it was that
way so, perhaps, Chris didn’t have a lot of say in what kinds of cards he
got.
Anyway, Priscilla finally left and then Chris came out. He came right up
to me and asked for a hug. He let Greg give him a hug too and things
calmed down after that. We explained to him that the reason that
Priscilla was willing to take him for the night was to give him a cooling
off period, and then Chris said," that’s the cool thing about our
family."
I said, "what do you mean?"
He said, "well, look at us, we’re all cooled down aren’t we?" He was
right. Anyway, He helped me and Liz make pizza and then Matt and Liz,
especially, were pretty clingy toward Greg and myself. They saw tough
love in action and I think that it was pretty intense. Caleb is pretty
laid back. I think that he was a little scared at first, but the
policeman was really sweet to him so Caleb ended up thinking that it was
pretty cool. He doesn’t have the depth of understanding that Matt and Liz
do.
Anyway, true to His word, God gave us all a peaceful night's sleep last
night and I awoke this morning in safety. Yesterday, I had prayed for
God’s glory to come out of this situation. When the policeman took Chris
out to his car, I remember sitting in my bedroom and saying to the Lord,
"okay, I trust that somehow Your glory is in this, but I’m not sure that
I get it yet. I’ll just trust you that you know what you are doing." Of
course, I know that he does.
Thanks for praying. I had hoped that prayer would bring about smooth
sailing and an easy time of it and, perhaps it was a lot smoother than it
would have been if we hadn’t turned it over to God in the first place.
"Oh the depths of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God. How
unsearchable are His judgments and His ways beyond understanding."
God bless,
Kathy

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