Guys, listen, I don't know how to say this to you all.  Every time I get
involved in friendships, they always come, and go...  usually they go
quicker than come.  i can't stand this game, of being hurt over and over and
over again.  It's absolutely nothing that any of you all have done, and pat,
it's especially nothing that you did, and this doesn't have anything
whatsoever to do with last Saturday, however, i just can't go on living,
with people constantly being my friend for maybe 3 at the most years, then
turning around just cause of one thing I do wrong, denying that there is a
problem, and then not even working with me to resolve it.  I just feel that
friendships are not worth it anymore.  I'm not directly directing this at
anyone specificly.  Again, I did say, this is no one on here who caused this
final decision of mine, it's just that time and time again, I've been hurt.
Time after time again, I've been let down.  Time after time, I've been lied
to.  Time after time, I've been spoken to both rudely, and unfairly.  I know
that God still loves me, but that doesn't really matter.  That is totally
beside my point.  This is not meant as a religiously written mail.  I'm
speaking totally humanly here.  i can not, and will not continue life,
risking my life on broken wings of friendships.  Thus, I am leaving this
list.  I might decide to correspond with some of you all still.  Right now
I'm very undecided.  Again, I need to stress and make sure that every single
one of you with no one left out, understands the complete reason why I'm
making this choice.  i'm not doing it to seek revenge.  Revenge hurts, and I
wouldn't put you all through it.  Plus, you all've done absolutely nothing
wrong.  it's me.  I just can't continue life like this, period.  I'm totally
scared to even trust anyone at this point.  You could give me a grape
jolly-rancher and tell me it was grape, and I wouldn't trust you.  That's
just how shudderedly torn I am.  i just can't do it any longer.  if any of
you want to write me off list, suredly I'll welcome your e-mail with no
harde feelings, and more than likely, i'll reply, but if i seem incredibly
tense, it's nothing at all you did, so please not to say it rudely, but get
over it and bear it.  I can't honestly help it.


Chris.