hi, amy. it does get easier!

besides health food stores, kosher stores/sections at groceries are great places to find dairy-free ("pareve") products.

the food allergy network sells little wallet-sized laminated ingredient cards that can be really helpful when shopping, & to give to friends/family who may feed your child.

did your pediatrician say anything about eliminating gluten, too? i know a number of familes with children w/ autism/pdd who swear by a gluten- and dairy-free diet. (tho some just focus on eliminating casein vs. all dairy products/proteins altogether...)  the feingold diet, tho, has little-no scientific support &   has been widely discounted; i wouldn't spend too much energy on that one....

good luck!

Marla Shapiro, Ph.D.
MSC 5A0622
Regents Center for Learning Disorders
Georgia State University
33 Gilmer Street SE, Unit 5
Atlanta, GA 30303-3085