I don't know what is going through her mind right now.  I'll tell you Beth,
I'm hoping that she understands something now that she didn't before.  I
can't wait to find out.  I can't take that chance.  The damage is done
anyway.  In ten years time, I won't be able to afford to have someone like
that anywhere near me.  I'm getting worse, I'm not getting better, and I'm
not staying the same.  I can't afford to take that kind of chance.

The very idea of speaking to a disabled adult as though they were a small
child!!!  It's different from being controlling in general.  As a disabled
person, I was a clear and present target.  The disability was the
advertisement.

Is there a difference between someone trying to beat up your body, and
someone trying to beat down your desire to think and act independently?  Is
there a difference, or is one worse than the other?  If one is worse, which
is it and why?  This is the question I am pondering now.

In the state of Maryland, as I hope in all states, psychological abuse is
legally regarded as abuse "period" in family law (I was divorced in MD, so
for that personal reason, I felt compelled to become at least a little
familiar with family law in that state).  Is this different?  Would it be
closer to say that if I were unable to physically defend myself against
someone entering my home, that my circumstances might be more in line with
those of a psychologically abused wife?

I dunno.  She can run.  Yeah, I know.  I'm not attempting to minimize her
psychological entrapment, but Lorena Bobbit cut her husband's wang off and
got away with it, didn't she?  Woo HOO!  That was in the Commonwealth of
Virginia!

Of course, I can hardly cut my girlfriend's wang off.  I don't have the right
power tools.

What though, if I tried to take control my environment in the only way I felt
possible, with the horrible anger and frustration that this fiercly
independant woman would undoubtedly feel should somebody attempt to
physically overpower her?  What charges will be levied against me?  And who
will support the oppressor's actions?  In the final analysis, the answer to
the latter question is the most important of all.

Oh yeah -- to all the do gooders who wish to know -- please be the idiot who
tries to drag me to a hair appointment against my will.  Please be that
f*cking stupid.  See if you like us being in the emergency room for three
weeks, while a team of doctors tries to get my foot out of your a**.

Oh yes, please try to do crime to me.

The scarier thing yet is that she will never know what she did.  When one of
her own parents is in a physically vulnerable state one day, her overwhelming
propensity to commandeer and control the environments, bodies, and minds of
those she cares for will come shining through.  I dare say that -- thank God
-- I will be advocating elsewhere at that time.

She isn't the lone ranger.  When my Mom was dying, I had to beat people off
who wanted to relieve her of the weight of decision making (interesting to
note that all were pro choice advocates).  Mom became a non person.  She
didn't want medical intervention and people decided that she didn't have a
right to decide that.  She had religious ground too.  She was a Christian
Scientist, but her constitutional rights were of no concern to many who
"loved" her.

Cave humani

How thin the veil of hypocrisy...

Thanks for getting it Beth.  We need to get you in public office..today.  In
failing that, would you consider becoming a psychiatrist, and infiltrating
the American Psychiatric Association?

In a message dated 1/27/2002 8:47:05 AM Eastern Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:


> Betty,
> That's really scary.  It's a scarier story than one of those horror flicks.
> You have been placed in a very real problem at a vulnerable time in life.
> Some do-gooders  I swear are the anti-Christ, you know people who seem to
> be
> doing good but, are doing for their own benefit and not from a loving
> giving
> place.  The problem comes when you get a life, their devil face shows up.
> There's one of those technical, medical names for the condition, can't
> think
> of it now.  I hope that's the last of it.  It would be hard to get a
> restraining order on it now would it.  She would need to sit outside the
> church to go.
>
> Beth the OT
>