Dear Jennifer,
Some ideas-- ask your new therapist about pool therapy. Some PTs do
acupuncture, and that helps. I had a PT do sessions of ultrasound (almost
same machine they use to look at Ava Rose (LOVE THE NEW NAME!), BUT NO
SCREEN. That really helped. My twin sister's favourite Christmas presents
(pregnant or not) were a foot massager with bubbles, and a hand held
massager that took batteries (and could be plugged into the wall to be
recharged), to give herself back rubs when her fiance was not around. You
might also ask at the hospital if there is a driving service who helps
patients to get you to the YMCA, or ask people at your place of
worship,friends, family, other supporters to help.

And don't think that you are not brave. You are helping to break down the
barriers that society has about women with disabilities even being  able to
physically carry children let alone being
mothers.
I HAVE A VERY PAINFUL MEMORY WHENMY CLASS IN GRADE 7 WAS LEARNING ABOUT
MALE/FEMALE REPRODUCTION, PADS, TAMPONS, CONDOMS--- ABOUT PEOPLE TEASING ME
THAT I COULD NEVER EVER HAVE CHILDREN, AND THAT IF I DID, THEY WOULD HAVE
THE SAME   "THING", DISORDER,WHATEVER, THAT I DID. They teased me
mercilessly anyway, but that really sticks out inmy mind. SO you are brave,
you are breaking barriers, and I think that any mother, disabled or not,is
brave... It is the hardest job that you will ever do, but also the most
rewarding. YOU WILL DO A GREAT JOB, and Ava Rose will be blessed with a
wonderful mother and father.... Chris, thank you for taking such good care
of our Jennifer. You are both brave parents, and Jen, you will find a way to
adapt changing diapers,carrying the baby to your disability. It took me a
long time to learn to diaper my nephew because I can only use one hand, but
the ehileration when I did it was great. I also learned that it might be
easier if you looked for baby clothes with zippers, as I had real difficulty
with the little snaps on the sleepers, etc. My nephew also had to adapt to
the fact that I could not pick him up like Mommy and Daddy, but we were able
to cuddle, and I COULD PUSH MYSELF IN MY MANUAL CHAIR WHEN MY SISTER THOUGHT
OF USING THE SNUGLI. Then she could push me in my chair, and the baby got
carried as well. This just comes from a few weeks w/ my four month old
nephew,  but thought it might help.

YOU ARE BRAVE, AS ARE ALL MOTHERS. YOU WILL FIND YOUR OWN WAY TO PARENT. The
little one will adapt to Mommy-- and society will just have to adapt to you!
Thank you for showing me that some day I might really find a man who loves
me in spite of my disability, and be a parent. I hope you find somerelief
from pain. I am in chronic pain right now, and struggling with narcotics/
physicians who don't believe me.
Thank you for proving to me once again that it is OK just to have normal
dreams-- want a job, a family, be free of pain. You are more special than
you know. Keep us informed as you are able. I pray that the birth of your
little one will be as natural as possible, as you wish it to be. Thank you
for being so honest. Know I THINK OF YOU OFTEN AND THAT YOU ARE AN
INSPIRATION.
Can't wait to hear that you and Chris are parents. I share THE THOUGHTS OF
MAG. Take care of yourself.
Lots of love,
Jenn
24 years old with spastic diplegic cerebral palsy, in university and hoping
to get married and have a child some day.
----- Original Message -----
From: "Jennifer Lahiff" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2002 10:35 PM
Subject: Re: For Jennifer Lahiff...


> In a message dated 3/23/02 4:29:12 PM Pacific Standard Time,
> [log in to unmask] writes:
>
> << Stay well... God bless. I will continue to pray for you. You are so
brave.
> >>
> When Chris showed me this email, tears literally flooded my
eyes....thankyou
> so much for that very kind post... Pregnancy has been a  challange for me
> physically and Having physical limitations already ... well... it gets
> rough...
> I do get in the pool occasionally at the YMCA  but with Chris'
schedule...
> it gets kind of difficult...
> I take many hot baths and get massages occasionally from Chris....both
work
> wonderfully, but it is only temporary relief...Needless to say, I am
really
> looking foward to what my new PT says or reccommends:))))
> ..... I wouldn't describe myself as being brave for having or becomming
> pregnant with this baby... I am a woman who simply wanted to share the
love
> my spouse  and I share and I and chose to try to become pregnant..I'll
tell
> you one thing I know for certain -.. Society definately has its opinions
> about disabled parents (especially mothers to be )..and having CP
definately
> makes pregnancy a bumpier ride... but when this child, this gift, arrives
> into this world... I know it's worth any bit of discomfort I endured...
And
> when you are blessed with your future child I know in my heart you will
feel
> the same way...
> Again, thankyou soooo much for thinking of me... you're a wonderful
person...
> Love,
> Jennifer
> PS... we changed the babys name to Ava Rose awhile back (shows often I
> post...which i'm very sorry for now....)
>