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Subject:
From:
Peter Altschul <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Peter Altschul <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Mon, 25 Nov 2002 16:47:55 -0500
Content-Type:
text/plain
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> Have A Microsoft Christmas
> (by Chet Raymo)
>
> 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house
> Not a creature was stirring, except father's mouse.
> The computer was humming, the icons were hopping,
> As father did last-minute Internet shopping.
>
> The stockings were hung next the modem with care
> In the hope that Santa would bring new software.
> The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
> With visions of computer games filling their heads.
>
> Dark Forces for Billy, Doom II is for Dan,
> Carmen Sandiego for Pamela Ann.
> The letters to Santa had been sent out by mom,
> To [log in to unmask] <mailto:[log in to unmask]>
> Which now had been re-routed to Washington State
> Where Santa's workshop had been moved by Bill Gates.
> All the elves and the reindeer had had to skedaddle
> To flashy new quarters in suburban Seattle.
>
> After living a life that was simple and spare,
> Santa now finds that he's a new billionaire,
> With a shiny red Porsche in place of his sleigh,
> And a house on Lake Washington just down the way
> From where Bill has his mansion, and the old fellow preens
> In black Gucci boots and red Calvin Klein jeans.
> The elves have stock options and desks with a view,
> Where they write computer code for Johnny and Sue.
>
> No more dolls or tin soldiers or little toy drums
> Will be under the tree, only compact disk roms
> With the Microsoft label. So spin up your drive,
> From now on Christmas runs only on Win95.
>
> More rapid than eagles the competitors came,
> And Bill whistled, and shouted, and called them by name.
> "Now, ADOBE! now, CLARIS! now, INTUIT! too,
> Now, APPLE! and NETSCAPE! you're all of you through,
>
> It's Microsoft's SANTA that the kids can't resist,
> It's the ultimate software with a traditional twist
> Recommended by no less than the jolly old elf,
> And on the package, a picture of Santa himself.
>
> Get 'em young, keep 'em long, is Microsoft's theme,
> And a merger with Santa is a marketer's dream.
> To the top of the NASDAQ! To the top of the Dow!
> Now dash away! dash away! dash away - wow!"
>
> And mum in her 'kerchief and me in my cap,
> Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,
> When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
> The whir and the hum of our satellite platter,
> As it turned toward that new Christmas star in the sky,
> The SANTALITE owned by the Microsoft guy.
> As I sprang from my bed and was turning around,
> My computer turned on with a Jingle-Bells sound.
>
> And there on the screen was a smiling Bill Gates
> Next to jolly old Santa, two arm-in-arm mates.
> And I heard them exclaim in voices so bright,
> HAVE A MICROSOFT CHRISTMAS, and TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT
>
>
>
>
>
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> [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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