I had a variant of this I wrote into a play:

Mary had a little lamb
She was not a vegetarian

Rayna Lamb wrote:

> Ooooh, now I get it!  Actually I have a couple of these myself:
>
> Mary had a little lamb
> Her father shot it dead
> And now it goes to school with her
> Between two hunks of bread
>
> There was a little girl
> With a little curl
> Right in the middle of her forehead
> When she was good, she was very, very good
> But when she was bad, she was better!
>
> And a couple more I found when researching nursery rhymes for a
> writing class:
>
> Pussycat, pussycat, where have you been
> Licking your lips with your whiskers so clean
> Pussycat, pussycat, purring and pudgy
> Pussycat, pussycat, WHERE IS OUR BUDGIE?
>
> This little pig went to market
> But I think that the point is well taken -
> It's the cute little pig that wisely stayed home
> Who succeeded in saving his bacon
>
> by Max Fatchen
> from "Wry Rhymes for Troublesome Times"
> (1983)
> As quoted in: (Holden, 1992 p84)
>
> I also have a very funny alternate version of Cinderella, I'll put it
> in another post maybe.
> I really hope you find an illustrater, Ken, there would definitely be
> a market for a book of this sort.
>
> On Tue, Mar 20, 2001 at 09:22:48AM -0500, Barber, Kenneth L. wrote:
>     I REALLY DO NEED TO PUBLISH THESE BUT, I NEED A CARTOONIST TO GO HALVERS
>     with me (sorry about caps) to illistate the book with pictures.
>
>     just to give you a sample.
>
>     little miss muppet
>     set on a tuffet
>     eating her currs and whey
>     along came a spyder
>     and sat down beside here
>     MISS MUFFET HAD MEAT THAT DAY!!!
>
>     product of my sick warped sense of humor.
>     if it were to be in a book, it would need a cartoon of a prissy looking
>     little girl sitting with the spider (large one) crawling up. and another
>     with her hand at her mouth with spider legs protruding in all directions.
>
>     i can't draw anything but flys so here i am. no publication. i have between
>     1 and 2 hundred of these goofball things.
>
>     -----Original Message-----
>     From: Rayna Lamb [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
>     Sent: Tuesday, March 20, 2001 9:11 AM
>     To: [log in to unmask]
>     Subject: Re: Relationships
>
>     Fractured nursery rhymes???  Never heard of them, please enlighten me,
>     Ken.
>
>     On Tue, Mar 20, 2001 at 08:15:36AM -0500, Barber, Kenneth L. wrote:
>         i have been tempted top write fractured fairy tales, simular to the
>         fractured nursery rhymes thing except they'd be longer.