updated list   for 03/09/01

"one brick shy of a load."
"The lights are on, but nobody's home."
"elevator does not go to the top"
"a few crackers short of a box"
"a few pickles short of a barrel"
"a sandwich short of a picnic"
"A couple french fries short of a Happy Meal"
"Not playing with a full deck"
"All his/her oars are not in the water."
"Kangaroos in the top paddock"
"If he/she had half a brain their head would rattle"
"He/she has two brain cells, one's out looking for the other"
"in a battle of wits, he/she is unarmed"
"His/her brain is like a camera, one bright flash and it's over."
"Bats in the belfry"
"lost their marbles"
"Half a bubble off plumb"
"A few beans short of a burrito"
"Not the brightest crayon in the box, are we?"
"not the sharpest knife in the drawer"
"a demitasse cup would fit his head like a sombrero"
"he would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle"
"if you give him a penny for his thoughts ,you get change back"
"forgot to pay his brain bill"
"an early example of Peter's Principal"
"Diagonally parked in a parallel universe."
"Doesn't just know nothing; doesn't even suspect much."
"Goalie for the dart team."
"Immune to caffeine and all other stimulants."
"when God was passing out brains, he/she thought he said 'rain' and hid
under a toadstool"
"He/She's off the beam"
"He/She's a quart low"
"He/She's a loaded bucket with a hole in the bottom"
"He/She's two sheets to the wind in a calm"
"Somwhere out there is a villiage being deprived of an idiot"
"That boy/gal is from third eyeball country, ya think?"
"That boy/gal's been out in the sun too long, brain's fried."
"That boy/gal's cerebrum is the circumfrence (sp?) of the anus of an
arachnid."
"Couldn't count his (insert body part) and get the same count twice."
"Doesn't have all his/her dogs barking"
"Couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery"
"Seen a better head on a glass of root beer"
"Seen better heads on pimples"
"He/She's hit rock bottom and has started to dig"
"His/her bread's not quite done"
"Talks like a man who fell out of a well"
"Doesn't have all his/her cups in the cupboard."
"A few clowns short of a circus."
"An experiment in Artificial Stupidity."
"A few beers short of a six-pack."
"The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead."
"One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl."
"One taco short of a combination plate."
"A few feathers short of a whole duck."
"All foam, no beer."
"The cheese slid off his cracker."
"Body by Jake, brains by Mattel."
"Has an IQ of 2, but it takes 3 to grunt."
"Warning: Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear."
"Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel."
"He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down."
"An intellect rivaled only by garden tools."
"As smart as bait.."
"Her sewing machine's out of thread."
"His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels."
"His belt doesn't go through all the loops."
"Missing a few buttons on his remote control."
"Surfing in Nebraska."