betty nearly all the people that i started work with are dead or got cancer.
i think about that lots, i dread the heck out of calls at night because my
parents are old and their health is going down. i wish we were closer where
judy and i could visit you and have you over.
got to go, my dog is barking at someone at the door.

hey guys i just got on, but, i am getting back off.

-----Original Message-----
From: Betty B [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
Sent: Saturday, November 11, 2000 6:18 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: Positive Thinking (formerly "Implications of CP on Aging,
etc .")


In a message dated 11/10/2000 7:12:31 PM Eastern Standard Time, [log in to unmask]
writes:

> no body will be speaking to me probably.
>
I sure will be.  You're one of the neatest people I know.

I don't seem to be able to pull off that positive attitude thing all the
time.  I am not a Pollyanna thinker, but I guess my positive thinking post
made me sound that way.  Either physically or emotionally, at times my
circumstances seem too overpowering.

I believe I could handle any of the physical things better if it weren't for
the incredible loneliness.  Lately it has been hitting me that my whole
family is gone -- they're all dead.  I almost can't believe it.  It's like,
"man this can't be happening, I must be dreaming."

I miss Astro's little kisses too.  God, I want my little girl back.

What am I trying to say, I'm not sure myself.  I guess I'm saying that I
don't deny the pain of the realities of my life.  I don't deny the physical
or emotional pain that other people on this list have either.

Sometimes things hurt like hell for all of us.

Betty