First of all I'm sorry I couldn't post more this week.  As many realized, my original post was very difficult to write. It is difficult to even think about this subject most of the time... and this week has been a tough one for me, missing Jo-Jo.

Thank you for all the supportive and thoughtful responses to my original post.

Joanne - thanks for your words in response to Michael's post. You "know" me well!  :-)

Steve - the poem is lovely. You touched my heart. May I share it with others? I belong to a list for parents who have lost their children who had special needs. The poem captures well our experience.

>>> [log in to unmask] 11/03/00 06:01AM >>>
I also think that those of us who are disabled, should not profess to know
all. Lets face it, I did not need a feeding tube, i didn't have seizures,<snip> I guess what I'm saying is that unless we were physically
there with Tracy we don't know what Tracy went thru. >>>>>>>>


Mag - you have said here what I was trying to say. I wish there HAD been another way. I wish Tracey were still alive. But if she were , I would want her to be happy and comfortable. Or BE ABLE TO UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS HAPPENING TO HER.  I wish that for my Joey as well. If someone is so cognitively impaired that they cannot comprehend their pain or suffering, doesn't that change things? Aren't the persons best qualified to make decisions for such children their LOVING parents? IMHO, I believe the Latimers loved their daughter. I believe her death was an act of mercy and compassion. The Canadian Justice system thus far agrees (in terms of the leniency of sentencing, etc.) Again, I never had to make this choice in our situation, but I don't know what I might have done after 5, 10 or 15 years of watching him suffer. What if I knew I was dying or could no longer care for him?  

<<<<<<<There is A difference between murder and puling the plug.>>>>>>>

Yes, and ther's a difference between murder and euthanasia; and "pulling the plug" and letting go.


Life-at-all-costs is not always the best or only option. Nor is death always a bad thing. Death with Dignity can be a beautiful transition. Just my opinion.

Yvonne