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From:
Elizabeth Margareta Griffith <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Fri, 14 Jul 2000 20:27:39 -0400
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<<Disclaimer: Verify this information before applying it to your situation.>>

Thanks for your replies - very reassuring, supportive, and useful!

A few dealt with the issue of not feeling great yet:  check for candida
albens, occupational gluten through such things as drywall, wallpaper and
library paste, pet foods, try D'Adamo's Eat Right for Your Type, try
Gottschall's Breaking the Vicious Cycle, and eliminating dairy.

On the issue of low weight and concentrating a lot on food becoming role
models of behavior that could lead to eating disorders, the overwhelming
advice was complete honesty about what is happening with my health.  With
no exceptions, experience showed that children can understand and handle
a parent's illness and even be helpful.  Also, many indicated that trying
to hide illness is destructive in and of itself, the child knows
something is not right and it erodes trust.  Good points.

On the issue of children developing eating disorders, I heard from
several who had 'been there' with their children (and have a lot of
respect for what they and their daughters have survived).  One suggestion
is not to allow a teen too much privacy which can allow the child to hide
bulimia.  Another is to openly discuss the models in magazines and talk
about marketing and how it has nothing to do with health.  One suggestion
was to look back at older ads for models of voluptuous glamorous women.
(One thing I have done is explicitly pointed out to my daughter that
female athletes are capable, powerful, successful, and not particularly
thin).  Emphasizing qualities of character rather than appearance when
praising the child - what the child does and is, not what she looks like.
Stress inner over outer beauty.

Taking this opportunity to put a positive spin on thinking about food,
modeling and explicitly pointing out what is healthy about a celiac diet
- lots of fresh foods, and emphasizing variety in fruits and vegetables
is another good suggestion.   On diet, to let the child learn to regulate
their own diet by appetite - providing variety and balance, but letting
the child eat as much/litte as she wants, and not using desserts to force
down other foods.  Talking about 'how mature people make choices' -
eating to feel good in the future as well as for immediate gratification.

I'm sure I haven't done complete justice to all the wonderful responses.
If anyone needs/wants furthur details on any of this, I'm saving the
responses and you can email me about the details you need.

Elizabeth

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