In a message dated 1/11/2000 6:17:22 PM Eastern Standard Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:

<< Any of you hammer-wielding, ivy-destroying, step-shrinking industry types
 ever figured this out? >>

Sir:

Haven't we been down this garden path with you before?  Or are you trying to
sucker the younger(?) generation of Pinheads (Greenhorn/Tenderfoot/Junior
Pinheads?) into telling you what to do, and then ignoring them?  How about
your (secret) cousin Philip in Toledo--doesn't he (or his sisters and his
cousins and his aunts) have a bad kitchen exhaust? Maybe they could tell you
what to do.

All seriousness aside, try either a left-handed smoke shifter, or a
peckerstretcher. You could call the Subzero repairman and ask him if his
refrigerators are running.   And take them all on a midnight snipe hunt in
Central Park....say in August.

Are you sure the smell in the bedroom is a turkey, and if it is a turkey,
that the turkey in question isn't also a best-selling author?  Could just be
dirty socks (or dirty Socks).

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

Ralph