In a message dated 97-11-07 00:31:45 EST, [log in to unmask] writes:

> When you meditate, think of me communing with the ancient colony of
>  ground hogs in the basement.

Trying to be PC (or RC as the case may be, not Roman Catholic), we billed our
annual December in-company dinner party as the _Holiday_ party. Considering
employees of several religious persuasions, some of which we have never heard
of before (including my own), we try to keep the spirit inclusive. So we got
a lot of complaints this time from the Christian RIGHT (one of our employees,
non-christian, collects armaments - I could have said ornaments, but that
would make this an absurd story - and is close enough to the psychic
borderline that we are afraid to invite Santa to dinner. Beside that, I went
to the costume store and all they had in animal was an aardvark. I'm going to
have to trim the nose.), who protested that they had to give up the Savior
every year. If they give up the Holy Ghost it is ok, I guess.

This was so touching that our one brave and selfless secretary, who has the
brunt of organizing the event, almost decided to call it all off. To the
rescue we have designated the dinner a celebration of Ground Hog Day, only a
bit early due to availability of the hall. Now we are worried that our staff
has been secretly harboring animal rights sentiments.

We do have a few vegitarians, but they only laugh at the rest of us. I keep
telling them that Yak-O-Bell is going to cater the event. Yak and water
chestnuts roasting on a sesame seed bun. Yum yum. Yak-gak suck-gum with
garlic goose pate. We have a franchise idea brewing here and Apple employees
are in the habit of loudly discussing the business plans while riding on
crowded subway cars. We want to do our part for tourism in NYC.

I think we need one of those historic food people on here, any ideas?
Sinuboob and turtle soup kind of stuff. Perhaps Rusty Lardo will fix us up a
vat of totally obnoxious gruel, something to make Macbeth's witches wince.

I thought it was blind old skunks that hid in basements? Or is that
procupines? Any idea how many skunks there are hiding under our National
Historic Monuments?

][<en Follett