Dear Carl ---
Ever since discovering that the "Standard American Diet" was not good
for us, some six years ago, my husband and I have had similar struggles.
We've been raw (for months at a time, and also in every combination you
can imagine: odd days, 6 days a week, etc.), and we've done juice and
water fasts (I fasted 32 days on water only). Only to crave pizza 2 days
later. For a very long time we felt overcome with guilt, for our genuine
desire was to be truly hygienic.
We also did not know where to turn. One cookie? Are you serious? More
like we'll stop eating the cookies when they're all gone. And denying
meant bingeing on foods worse than those we originally denied ourselves.
Like you, we were victim to the phenomenon described by the old saying,
"that which you resist persists."
I would recommend several things to you that have worked for us. Through
the following, we are finally able to relax around food, the bingeing
has stopped, we're actually eating much more consistently and probably
healthier than ever, and we believe that our diet will continue to
gradually improve.
1. THERAPY, with an understanding, appropriate therapist, can work
wonders. We have found that it is important for the therapist to be
fairly alternative (your basic "medical" therapist might want to treat
with drugs and really can't relate to achieving a higher existence
through diet). If you are interested, our therapist (who is WONDERFUL
and has a "spiritual" bent of the new age type, but not too "woo-woo")
will work with people out of state via phone.
2. Silva Mind Method. Awesome and powerful. I have used it for personal
issues and in my business.
3. Stop the cycle of guilt. Guilt implies that there's good and bad and
you end up playing all sorts of games. For you to truly get to the
point where you choose what you eat, you've got to start with allowing
yourself to have WHATEVER you want to eat. Of course, the fear is that
you won't be able to stop and you'll eat yourself into a sugar coma. Not
true. But if you continue to deny yourself, and beat up on yourself
after a dozen or two cookies, and swear that beginning tomorrow you're
all raw, this will go on and on. Cultivate a different attitude about
foods for now: all foods are perfectly fine in any combination and
amount. Whatever you want to eat whenever, go for it. And the important
part: don't attach any meaning to your eating that allows you to hate
yourself after or be guilty or any of that. If whatever you eat is fine
and good, you can't feel guilty. You won't stay long in this mode
probably, as long as you work on total permission and loving yourself
totally.
As far as using this technique for alcohol or drugs, I can't say for
sure. It seems that it could be dangerous. AA or CA or NA would be the
best bet. We also have a friend that swears by overeaters anonymous.
4. Sugar alternatives. You can make a lot of great satisfying foods with
alternatives that do satisfy you. Of course, the goal isn't to say these
substitutes are "better" than sugar, but you may find them easier to
justify at first, and they are less refined. Try date sugar, maple
syrup, etc.
Two years ago, my husband and I listened to Gabriel Cousens, MD speak
about food and the Essene religion. After his talk we described our
struggles to eat an all raw diet. He said, why not be gentle and loving
towards yourself and consider the raw diet to be a longer term goal? He
suggested doing it over years. Being all or nothing people, my husband
and I had a hard time with that advice at the time, but I think it's
accurate.
I hope these ideas are helpful. Feel free to respond privately or
publicly if you want more information about anything I mentioned.
To your health,
Bonnie
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