Pat said:
>>Pat, it may just be me but maybe you should use emoticons as the
>>smiley :-) a little more liberally -  without your remark could for a
>>sensitive soul be taken as a somewhat testy and hostile statement.

Peter said:
>Wellnow, really, thank you so much for this public reprimand, how very
>generous of you to assume your other members are too dense to grasp my
>sense of humor or too inspoken to take care of their own understanding
>and email relationships.

I am one of those "dense" members to which you refer who has sometimes
felt very uneasy when you have expressed yourself in too ambiguous
terms and I do not know for sure if you are expressing yourself in jest
or if you actually are expressing a grudge against somebody - and this
is even though it has never been expressed towards me. As a "regular"
member of this list I would have reacted no differently than I have
with now you, because I know the fear of being ridiculed, being called
thick and a bad sport would prevent most people from speaking up.
Anybody who remembers from the list before I started as moderator can
attest to this.
Pat, you have a strong wit and powerful command of the English language
I can only envy but it sometimes can be a little intimidating for the
less educated and verbally endowed like myself.

>Such children would surely be lost without such superior leadership.

You would be surprised how few people feel safe to speak up for
themselves in a forum such as this. Besides, I spoke up because your
sarcasm made me, Peter, feel uncomfortable.

>Right now I assure you I have lost my sense of humor. Sorry I
>can't find an emoticon for you so that you can understand my meaning
>here, but suffice it to say that I am much too old to need another
>daddy, and cannot, will not tolerate a dictator who gets his jollies
>from sending guests in his home whose opinions are at odds from his
>own into the closet, only allowing them out if they make public
>apology, and promise to be good.

You must be alluding to the vegans who were booted off the list. I do
not see how it makes me a dictator asking people to either respect the
present guidelines of the list or to discuss with me in private or
public which part they disagree with, how they think they could be
improved or if they think I am being a hypocrite. You apparently agree
with the present guidelines but do not approve of my style of executing
them. I have chosen from the start an open style of moderation rarely
expressing my grievances with somebody in private. I have chosen this
approach so everybody can follow what I am doing so to prevent fears of
favoritism. It not only gives me necessary feedback if I am out of line
but also assures those who feel they might have been treated unfairly
that indeed they, rather than their "offenders", are being protected.
Besides, we all make mistakes, and I do not see the big deal in to
publicly admitting when we have been off.
The problem with some people feeling that have been too dictatorial has
come into the focus when they have felt that they were being unfairly
chided and felt that they were supposed to confess their sins in public
despite them feeling they were in the right. I am not sure how to
remedy this. As a moderator I cannot please everybody but if I observe
some people feeling unfairly treated but who are unable to listen to
(my definition of) reason, mend their ways or involve themselves in (my
definition of)constructive dialogue, then all I can do is to call the
shots as I see them and hope that somebody will call me on it if they
see me being out of line or not living up to my own principles (or
better principles) and practicing what I preach.

>Apparently this list is not a forum for diversity of ideas, but a
>dictatorship.

What has criticizing you for not using smileys have to do with
censoring ideas?

>OK. It's your list, you have the right.

It is not "my" list. I just happen to be the present moderator.

>And so do I. Shove it, Peter. (That's a stop).

Pat, since you have been on the list I have several times gently hinted
to you that sarcasm comes across very poorly in a written forum like
this and using emoticons is an easy remedy to avoid misunderstandings.
All I am asking is that you please respect & honor this concern.

The last thing on my mind was to offend you, and I hope this message
has contributed to a better understanding between us. Peace?

Best, Peter
[log in to unmask]