Assalumu Allaik
A brilliant piece of Gambian literature keep it up
Baba Galleh Jallow <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
Dilemma of an Angry Doctor
By Baba Galleh Jallow
Dr. Maafimun Norpitek, managing director of Whatyasay Enterprises, was extremely exasperated. So extremely exasperated that he locked himself into his office, dashed under his executive desk, and loudly wept and blew his nose and pulled his ears. So angry was he that he opened his drawer and stuffed Chinese balm into his ears, rubbed it into his eyes and furiously rubbed finger-fulls onto his teeth. Then he squat on the polished floor of his posh office and loudly wailed and called down curses on all those impudent blokes who would have him dead.
Maafimun Norpitek could just not understand why people hated him so and wished him dead. He could not understand why people opened their big mouths and told lies not only about themselves, but about his respectable and illustrious self. They go so far as to claim that they knew who was the first woman to set foot on the moon, or that in fact, the Americans had taken a monkey with them on their trip to Mars, which they called a red planet while it was in fact blue. Dr. Norpitek could not see why people told white lies and red lies and blue lies and green lies and lies of multi-colored layers, all because they wanted to be famous like him and would not call him Sir. And then when he took his valuable time to do those nonentities and the entire big wide world a favor by pointing out their errors and mapping out the way forward for their confused thought processes, every single one of them jumps out in their puny little coats with their puny little minds and midget ideas and try to call
him fool, and liar, and all the other stupid names their blind imaginations could suggest to them.
Maafimun Norpitek’s current dilemma arose from a very simple affair. An affair so simple that he saw no reason why he should bother explaining it, or even thinking about it. But his decent senses had just been so severely offended that he could not keep his computer brain from thinking about it and his soul of all souls from grieving at the monstrous idea. Hirsute hell, chimney spouts, black thunder clouds! Would he were in a position to get hold of all those impudent blokes and put them in their places! Physically slap them in the face and bang them in the mouth, so that next time before they opened their big mouths and try to monster him, they would think four big times! If he saw something written in the local media, something inaccurate, something wrong, something really stupid and petty, something likely to lead the whole world astray, something likely to make good honest folks stumble and fall on their noses and hurt themselves, was it not only proper that he should rush to the
urgent rescue? Was it not only proper that he, Dr. Maafimun Norpitek, PhD Saachatics, MA Prating, BSc Pushanteh - is it not only proper that he should put aside all he had to do and run to the pious rescue?
But then, when he took his invaluable time, his precious energy, his very special pen and paper, and set his diamond mind to work and published a well-researched and learned treatise on the virtues of truth-telling and the great dangers of lying, everyone - the world big wide world of fools and sycophants! - jumped on him and started asking stupid questions, making illegitimate and ridiculous demands on him, as if he was the only person who ever wrote. For months on end, big-mouthed fools and jealous midgets sent letters to the editor harping on what he should write and what not. They wrote such stupid things as Dr. Norpitek does not seem to understand . . . Maafimun Norpitek completely misses the point . . . Could Norpitek please explain . . .? Dr. Maafimun with all due respect . . . Our respectable compatriot Norpitek . . . Maafimun Norpitek is an intelligent man, but this time around . . . Maafimun Norpitek this . . . Maafimun Norpitek that!!! Dr. Maafimun Norpitek!! Dr. Dool!! He
was sick and tired of all those stupid fools making it their business to set him straight! He was sick and tired of all those intellectual dwarfs trying to measure their flat heights against his giant stature! He was tired of every Kumba, Pateh and Samba calling his pious name and asking him stupid questions! In fact, he had no time to respond to any jealous midgets! He was going to keep his pious cool and let the idiots rave and rant their sick lungs out!
Thus resolved, our great Maafimun Norpitek maintained a stony silence and all our common folks said, where is Dr. Norpitek? Why hasn’t he responded to our queries? This is unlike the great guy? Little did they know that Dr. Norpitek, alias Vulture, was cleverly perched on top of his favorite tree, patiently waiting to swoop down and teach them a very good lesson they would never forget. Silence is the best policy, he kept reminding himself.
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