Here are some jokes.  Some I have heard before.

text of forwarded message follows:

>~~~
>         The Pastor vs The Choir Director
>
>         There was a feud between the Pastor and 
> the Choir Director of the Hicksville Southern 
> Baptist Church.. It seems the first hint of 
> trouble came when the Pastor preached on 
> 'Dedicating Yourselves to Service' and the 
> Choir Director chose to sing: 'I Shall Not Be 
> Moved'. Trying to believe it was a coincidence, 
> the Pastor put the incident behind him.
>
>         The next Sunday he preached on 
> 'Giving.' Afterwards, the choir squirmed as the 
> director led them in the hymn: 'Jesus Paid It 
> All'. By this time, the Pastor was losing his temper.
>
>         Sunday morning attendance swelled as 
> the tension between the two built. A large 
> crowd showed up the next week to hear his 
> sermon on 'The Sin of Gossiping.' Would you 
> believe the Choir Director selected the song: 'I Love T o Tell The Story'.
>
>         There was no turning back. The 
> following week the Pastor told the congregation 
> that unless something changed, he was 
> considering resignation. The entire church 
> gasped when the Choir Director led them in: 'Why Not Tonight'?
>
>         Truthfully, no one was surprised when 
> the Pastor resigned a week later, explaining 
> that Jesus had led him there and Jesus was 
> leading him away. The Choir Director could not 
> resist: 'What A Friend We Have In Jesus.'
>
>                           JOKES THAT CAN BE TOLD IN CHURCH
>
>                           Attending a wedding 
> for the first time, a little girl whispered to 
> her mother, 'Why is the bride dressed in white?''
>                           The mother replied, 
> 'Because white is the color of happiness, and 
> today is the happiest day of her life.'
>                           The child thought 
> about this for a moment then said, 'So why is the groom wearing black?'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           A little girl, 
> dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast 
> as she could, trying not to be late for Bible 
> class. As she ran she prayed, 'Dear Lord, 
> please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late!'
>                           While she was running 
> and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, 
> getting her clothes dirty and tearing her 
> dress. She got up, brushed herself off, and 
> started running again! As she ran she once 
> again began to pray, 'Dear Lord, please don't 
> let me be late...But please don't shove me either!'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           Three boys are in the 
> school yard bragging about their fathers. The 
> first boy says, 'My Dad scribbles a few words 
> on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.'
>                           The second boy says, 
> 'That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words 
> on piece of paper, he calls it a song, and they give him $100.'
>                           The third boy says, 
> 'I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few 
> words on a piece of paper, he calls it a 
> sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           An elderly woman died 
> last month. Having never married, she requested 
> no male pallbearers. In her handwritten 
> instructions for her memorial service, she 
> wrote, 'They wouldn't take me out while I was 
> alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead.'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           A police recruit was 
> asked during the exam, 'What would you do if 
> you had to arrest your own mother?' He answered, 'Call for backup.'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           A Sunday school 
> teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary 
> took Jesus with them to Jerusalem. A small 
> child replied, 'They couldn't get a baby-sitter.'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           A Sunday school 
> teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments 
> with her five and six year olds. After 
> explaining the commandment to 'Honor thy father 
> and thy mother,' she asked, 'Is there a 
> commandment that teaches us how to treat our 
> brothers and sisters?' Without missing a beat, 
> one little boy answered, 'Thou shall not kill.'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           At Sunday School they 
> were teaching how God created everything, 
> including human beings.. Little Johnny seemed 
> especially intent when they told him how Eve 
> was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
>                           Later in the week his 
> mother noticed him lying down as though he was 
> ill, and she said, 'Johnny, what is the 
> matter?' Little Johnny responded, 'I have pain 
> in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife.'
>                           ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~
>
>                           Two boys were walking 
> home from Sunday school after hearing a strong 
> preaching on the devil. One said to the other, 
> 'What do you think about all this Satan stuff?'
>                           The other boy 
> replied, 'Well, you know how Santa Claus turned 
> out. It's probably just your Dad.'
>                           ~~~~~~~~~~~~
>
>                           You don't stop 
> laughing because you grow old. You grow old 
> because you stop laughing! Take heed and pass 
> these along to people who need a laugh. I 
> thought you would enjoy this....times are tough 
> right now...for all of us....so we need 
> something to make the day a happy place. 'They' 
> haven't found a way to tax you for laughing yet.
>
>In our neck of the woods in Silver Springs, 
>Florida Partly Cloudy, 75°F Wind:NNW-330° at 9mph
>Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
>Anna
text of forwarded message ends:

John
Currently in Ocala, Florida Partly Cloudy, 91°F 
Wind:WNW-290° at 12mph gusting to 20mph
Bald Guys never have a bad hair day.
Created by Weather Signature v1.33 • http://www.weathersig.com