Hey phil!

You and sandy got married on my birthday!  How cool is that!  Or, i should
say, i was born on your anniversary!  lol!

Jenifer Gilley
Christ came that we may have life everlasting!
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-----Original Message-----
From: The Electronic Church [mailto:[log in to unmask]]On
Behalf Of Phil Scovell
Sent: Monday, December 31, 2007 4:29 PM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Give Me, Give Me


Although Sandy and I have almost been married for 37 years, well,
as of January the eighth of next month that is, I have just about
had it up to here with e harmony dot com advertisements.  The
other day, while watching something on a satellite channel,
another one of their commercials came on.  As I listened, I asked
myself, why don't they run a bunch of commercials of people who
got married, then divorced, or people who got together through
their online services, and then split up.  Don't they know, or
don't we know, that it is often the case that opposites match and
not those who are 29 dimensions of compatibility?  I mean, how
many years have these e harmony commercials been running?  Three
maybe?  Four?  By the way, I have done a little research and
talked with singles who have logged on to e harmony looking for
someone compatible.  One guy I pray with found a lady locally,
they dated a few times, and broke up.  Another lady I pray with
from Indiana said some of the questions she had to fill out would
have classified her as a nut so she gave up and never did answer
all the question.  Another lady in Arizona, who was living with a
man who was deeply into online and print pornography and weirded
out on dumb video games as a grown man, broke up with him because
she realized Jesus should be more important to her than what this
guy was doing for her, and to her, and guess what?  He isn't even
a Christian, well, he says he got born again in high school, and a
chicken has lips, too, and he joined e harmony and is now dating a
gal locally.  I wonder if e harmony has a question that asked,
"Are you addicted to pornography and video games?"  Somehow, I
doubt it and besides, if a man was so addicted, do you honestly
think he'd admit to it when filling out the 29 dimensions of
compatibility report?  I wouldn't, that's for sure, and I'm not
even addicted, to porno that is.  Anyhow, I just wonder about such
things like this when watching some of these mega ministry shows,
and I used the correct word, shows, on TV who read all these
glowing reports of people who sent in their last 50 dollars and
got 5,000 dollars in return within 24 hours.  I think, "Why don't
they read the letters of people who went bust after sending in
their last 50 dollars or who have written back and said, I want my
money back because you didn't make it work?"  I know, I think
backwards about such things but maybe we should think about the
other aspects of such things, especially since e harmony is
supposed to be run by a Christian guy in the first place.
Wouldn't you think churches should be putting people together
instead of a freaking website making millions of dollars in the
first place or what?  I was listening to a Christian network TV
show, there's that word again, the other day and the man and
woman, I didn't recognize who they were, were talking about how to
be blessed financially.  Their suggestion, no, their divine
revelation, if you please, was based upon 200 freaking dollars.  I
didn't even have 20 at the time so I was a sub standard Christian
apparently.  However, they were reading dumb letters and telling
even dumber testimonies about people who sent in their last 200
dollars and how they were getting thousands of dollars in return
within a day or week.  They were, of course, recommending you do
the same and not to your own church but to their ministry.  No big
surprise there.  I wanted to call their hot line for Jesus up and
say, "Hey, why don't you send me, and all your 5 million
listeners, 200 dollars a piece and let God bless you instead?
What is this, give me, give me, give me, theology you keep
preaching.  Ain't you ever heard of giving?"  I figured they'd
just hang up on me without sending me 200 dollars in the first
place so I skipped calling them.  I think I told the story of my
mom calling me years ago, she is passed away now, and she and my
step dad, were attending the largest church in Denver.  This
church, by the way, was one of the churches where, in their branch
ministry, a couple of people were shot and killed in recent weeks.
Anyhow, mom was really confused and had worry in her voice when
she called.  She told me that this church, the previous Sunday
morning, passed out sealed envelopes, following a very passionate
sermon that was preached.  People were asked not to open their
envelopes until they were instructed to do so.  The sermon, of
course, was about financial blessings we can receive from God if
we are generous.  It was probably, you go first, type of preaching
but that is just a cynical suggestion on my part.  Anyhow, the
members, of which there were about 5,000 in attendance that
morning, when told to open their envelopes, each were given a 20
dollar bill.  They were told that the church just wanted to bless
them financially and that they could return the money in the
offering next Sunday, if they liked, take their family out to
eat, by some ice cream, or do whatever they desired with the
money.  If they think you can take your family out to eat for just
20 bucks, they have rocks in their head but I digress.  I asked my
mom what she and my step dad were going to do with the money?  She
said, "Well, we are going to give it back.  What else?"  Guess
what the offering was next Sunday?  Mom told me that, based upon
the number of adults, and remember, out of 5,000 people in the
auditorium, there were lots of children, too, the total amount
the adults were given 20,000 dollars.  Yes, indeedie.  They done
announced this dollar amount from the pulpit.  No, I have no idea
why they made such an announcement.  I thought the Bible said not
to let the right hand no what the left hand is doing when it came
to money but maybe I have never understood that theology in the
first place.  So, the next Sunday, the offering is taken and
quickly counted.  The total was 30,000 dollars.  Ain't that nice?
Mom said they put extra money in that next Sunday, too, besides
the 20 bucks they each got.  Why?  Well, shoot.  Everyone wants
God to bless them financially.  right?  Anyhow, this is my way of
starting out the new year.  I want everybody to send me 200
dollars.  If you don't have that, I'll take 20 dollars.  If you
don't have that, I'll take 2 dollars.  If you don't have 2
dollars, I'll take a dollar.  If you don't have even that much,
forget it.  God won't bless you if you are that cheap.

Phil.


The Curse That Works Is The One We Believe
WWW.SafePlaceFellowship.com