A letter to Mrs. West from Kmart (YES KMART)

During the pass 6 months our security staff has been
monitoring your 
husbands activiites while in our store.  The list
below details  his 
offences.  We have to the video to verify his
behavior.


Since we ban him and he comes with you, we BAN you
too.

The following is a detailed report of you hubands
activities:

Sept 16; Took  24 boxes of condoms and randomly put
them in people 
cart when they weren't looking.

Oct 2:  Set all alarm clocks in House wares to go off
a 5 minute 
intervals.

Oct 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor
leading to the rest 
rooms.

Oct 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in and
Official 
tone "Code 3" in house wares and watched what
happened.

Oct 22: Went to Service Desk and asked to put a bag of
M&M's on Lay- 
a-way.

Nov 7: Moved a "Caution-Wet Floor" sign to carpet.

Nov 15: Set up a tent in the camping department, told
people "he 
would invite them in if the brought pillows".

Nov 20: While in Gun department he asked  the atendent
where the Anti-
depressants are.

Nov 30: Darted around the store humming "Mission
Impossible".

Dec 5: In auto Dept., he used different sized funnels
to practice 
his "Madonna look"

Dec 11: Hide in clothing rack, When people browse rack
he pops out 
saying "Pick me, Pick me"!

Dec 18: When an Annocement came  over the loudspeaker
he assume the 
fetal position and Screams "NO,  No,  It's those
Voices again!".

Sincerely,

Justin Smith
Store Manager


Now we can really blame men, people just don't have a
sense of humor  
sometimes,  Right?



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