>>From radioman  Tue Apr 20 11:32:36 1999
>To: <[log in to unmask]>
>From: BILL AND MAXI <[log in to unmask]>
>Date: Tue, 20 Apr 1999 11:30:46 -700
>X-Mailer: Net-Tamer 1.11.2
>Subject: 50 Things To Do In an Elevator
>
>Status:
>
>    1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
>    2. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the
>    other passengers that this is your "personal space."
>    3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering:
>    "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
>    4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World"
>    incessantly.
>    5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
>    6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of
>    the elevator.
>    7. Shave.
>    8. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside
>    ask: "Got enough air in there?"
>    9. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours
>    upside-down.
>    10. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall,
>    without getting off.
>    11. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors
>    open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
>    12. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol
>    coming!"
>    13. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake
>    and ask them to call you Admiral.
>    14. One word: Flatulence!
>    15. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it
>    stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go
>    "plink" at the bottom.
>    16. Do Tai Chi exercises.
>    17. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then
>    announce: "I've got new socks on!"
>    18. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh,
>    not now, damn motion sickness!"
>    19. Give religious tracts to each passenger.
>    20. Meow occasionally.
>    21. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
>    22. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and
>    say "oops!"
>    23. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
>    24. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
>    25. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
>    26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
>    27. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're
>    one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
>    28. Burp, and then say "Mmmm...tasty!"
>    29. Leave a box between the doors.
>    30. Ask each passenger getting on if you can push the button for
>    them.
>    31. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers
>    "through" it.
>    32. Start a sing-along.
>    33. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "was that your
>    beeper?"
>    34. Play the harmonica.
>    35. Shadow box.
>    36. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
>    37. Lean against the button panel.
>    38. Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
>    39. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
>    40. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your Kleenex
>    to other passengers.
>    41. Bring a chair along.
>    42. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see
>    wha in muh mouf?"
>    43. Blow spit bubbles.
>    44. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
>    45. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host
>    body."
>    46. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
>    47. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
>    48. Wear "x-ray specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
>    49. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
>    50. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
>    <*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*><*>
>
>                     BILL KOPPELMANN N0JIO
>                      [log in to unmask]
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