At 09:26 PM 8/24/1999 EDT, the Humor Czar wrote:
>diners are the illegitimate parents of McDonald's (whose
>fries are the best), Burger King (whose burgers are best), Taco Bell (whose
>Meximuck is the best on this godforsaken coast, but that ain't saying much).
>Wendy's and their squareburgers are beneath contempt.

Sir Czar, although I would agree with all that you have written in this
missive, you have neglected to include the greatest in the Midwest:
Hardee's and A&W.  Now, at one time Hardee's had the best fries (especially
when dipped in one of their thick, frosty shakes), but they have succumbed
to peer pressure to make their fries thin and crunchy (like BK)...   The
shakes are runnier now, too...

And who can forget driving up to the A&W to order a burger and a root beer
float.  A decade ago, when I worked at a summer camp, we would visit the
local A&W weekly and often entertained the locals with our camp songs (why
they enjoyed THAT, I will never know).  One night we complained that
although we could get free refills on our small cups of root beer, we never
could get a free refill on the gallon that accompanied us back to the camp.
 That night, they offered one of my cohorts a free gallon, IF he could
drink the first gallon by himself in the dining area.  Now, "Chilly" was
never one to turn down a challenge, so you can imagine our evening...  Over
an hour of Chilly's drinking and burping to make room for more.  By the end
of the night, a stranger would have thought that he had drunk a few gallons
of vodka.  And although he finished that gallon of root beer -- on his own
-- and he received the free refill, he was never quite the same again...

Barbara