>Labor day ;>

7:00 am the screen door slams; my
inner radar alarm goes off ;
those  with  the care of young children understand this;
it is built in programing able to withstand the deepest of sleeps.
Try as you might ; with little feet running outside
big feet are sure to follow

You are half asleep you are on your feet running out the door in whatever
your sleeping attire is;  which on this bright cheerful morming of no labor
 is myCalvine Cline whitey tidys  (white briefs).
Now I want you to understand white briefs are not my usual fashion statement;
I prefer the boxers I got for Christmas with the dice on them ; but never
mind .

I spot her crossing the vineyard chasing "Thelma"  our dog ,towards the
nighbors.yard
a good couple of hundred yards. as the crow flys .
I call to her;     but our young daughter has reached the age of selective
hearing; a difficult malady that  by the teen years is vicious and rampant
especially around room cleaning issues
However by the time they hit marriage  the said malady as developed into an
art form;

"Don't you think so dear ?" ....(silence)
"I  just knew  you would agree with me ; (more silence)

In animated fashion I call to her
No response  from Da Da s stern commands
 She is on a tear as far as the eye
can see.

Unconscious of my attire; and fearful for her saftey;
  I bound the steps and quickly stub my toe
Real men don't cry
so I make my way past the vineyard in a series of gallops
and hops making low guttural sounds so as not to draw attention to myself.
Fat chance .
Just then a neighbor lady drives by and waves;
I turn and  meekly wave realizing I have given the village something to talk
about for
months if not years. I can hear them at the Christmas party

"How nice , there is that nice Mr. Michael " hoping around his garden  in his
whity tidys " ...

Grrr.  Im in pain, my mind is racing  and I think The hecl with em ;
 if anyone asks   I will tell em  its the  pagan ritual for Labor Day.

Peanut  has now darted behind the neighbors house ; and camouflaged herself
into  their children play house that is next to their dog house  where  a
mongrel named "bone crusher " lives .

Part pit bull and part mongrel  Bone crusher lives up to his name
The amazing thing is  Bone crusher and Mary  get along
and Bone crusher andThelma get along ;
the big problem is
"me" and bone crusher ....do not get along....

I make for a tree and while doing so with my hopping motion slip again; this
time sliding on my butt over wet grass .
Not good
Righting myself into the protection of the tree the situation now appears
desperate;
Bone crusher  has awaken from sharing fleas with Thelma and is  is lunging at
me through  his  chain emitting  demonic barks and a set of razor sharp
canines..
 Thelma meanwhile is helping herself to his  his food bowl ;

Peanut, the little Dear   is serving tea to stuffed bunnies  ; while  I am
half naked with a large brown stain on the derriere of my whity tidys.

Fifteen minuets ago I was asleep ; blissful rest after a night of  Blues
clubbing; with the Mrs.
 You see my  wife has been balancing her creative time between being an
architect
and the Mayor ; to singing in Black blues clubs called Juke joints
( back water bars  that dot the Delta and the black communitas) i


Her style is like big mama Thorton or Ko Ko  Taylor ; and I ve got to hand it
to her she can belt it out and get em standing .
. Her last song of the evening was 2 am ; singing "I gots what it takes "( to
gets my man) ..and it had all  them black women standing up and hollering...
Usually Im no shriking violet ;but these clubs also have illicit games of
chance so when the dice game went bad a 2:15 it was time to make haste .

That was a mere 5 hours ago .

As I hide behind the neighbors tree in my underwear  yelling  for Mary to come
in horse whispers so as not to wake my neighbors the Born Agains  .

You see Mr. Born Again is a patrolman; and I know that ; if I looked out my
window and saw my neighbor hoping around  in his underwear with brown stains
in
my back yard   I may have fearful thoughts.
As a patrolman Mr. Born Again  is armed ; and heavily so I might add .He is
also very protective of Mrs Born Again

Now if Mrs Born Again; a defender of the faith and a symbol of modesty  is to
spot me first ; that might set him off.
Perhaps  if I had washboard abs and the hard body of 15 yrs ago ;  Mrs Born
Again may study me long enough  to reconsider any negative recriminations
made to  Mr. Born Again.

But the years haven't been kind that way ; and oh well
gravity has got the better  parts of me making bows  for  past performances
 long over.

As for Mary
 I had to act and act fast ;
Peanut  is following dog ; (so the thinking goes)
so call the Dog  ......." Here Thelma "
Thelma is clever to bones but not to empty hands ;
but as bone crusher is yapping on his chain  I get Thelma  to come on the
second try

Then  as luck would have it Mary follows and I grab her hand  and begin to
explain matter of factly with fire in my sleepless eye  why we just do not
run off  like
that.

Just then there is tapping on the window ; Mr and Mrs born again are there ;
Mrs Born Again pretends to hide her eyes ; and they are both mockly  smiling
and giving weak hinged  hand waves..  Nothing like the .hinged hand wave to
make one feel at home . Socially  its ..the kiss of death; but it beats bird
shot .
...Naturally my brown stained back side faces them ..

I quickly turn  and  give my best  " its cool " "wave
then try to walk  backwards while facing them and holding on to Mary as if
its an everyday thing to do so in my  whity tidys .

"Its cool I wave again " as I nimble hobble barefoot  over their  sharp
gravel  drive
past Bone crusher going nuts on his chain..
I sweet smile at the dog  "Hes so cute '

Once back  back into the stillness of the  vineyards...I let Peanut know with
no uncertainty about  some lines she is not to cross with old Da Da .
She crys when I talk harsh to her ; but I get her focused and offer my hand
"Deal ?">
She calculates her position ; then ...she takes my hand with her tiny hand
.."Deal"   Da -Da
 The morning is soft and the sun arcs through the cloud mist ; we make it
back to the bed room where much to my good fortune Im able to cash in on the
reward of a few more hours of sleep, beautiful sleep.
Michael<


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