Hi All,

  I can't recall ever being depressed because of having/living with
cerebral palsy. CP doesn't "have" me. I think that's the key. I don't
allow it to dictate my life to any great extent. As I age with cerebral
palsy, and the various secondary quirks of the condition, I adapt - I
rest more. I don't push myself so hard. I accept that I cannot do
certain things with the same comfort/ease as I did even 6 months ago.
That's life. That's living.

  I think, too, how one is nurtured (or not nurtured) in
infancy/toddlerhood, early childhood/teens has a great deal to do with
how they/we turn out.

  As I have been reading the various posts, I am struck by the number of
people living with cerebral palsy who seem to come from dysfunctional
families. Families who couldn't adequately cope with raising a disabled
child and transferred those feelings to the child, which then manifested
themselves into feelings of worthlessnesses. As a consequence, it seems,
many of you/them have absorbed a lot of toxic waste that has nothing at
all to do with "having" cerebral palsy, but is more connected with how
you/they were treated as a person, aside from, or in spite of the
condition we know as cerebral palsy.

  Depression can visit anyone, anywhere at any time, with or without
benefit of living with/having, or becoming disabled.

  I grew up in a family of 8 children, being #7. Fortunately, I escaped
the taunts of school mates. It wasn't part of the "program", if you
like, when I was growing up. I was just "me". I never then, nor do I
now, have a strong disability-based "identity". It doesn't define who I
was, who I am, or who I can/will become. I think, in large part, my
perceptions of myself are rooted in acceptance by family (parents and
siblings) from the outset. With that came community acceptance - I went
to school, to church, participated in various activities. Long before
"integration" I was integrated/mainstreamed. So, it never occurred to me
as I grew up and grew away from the safety net of parents and family,
that things would be any different. I had a university life, a work
life, and now a married life with all that goes with it.

  I am concerned when someone with cp or other such condition "wishes I
could be 'normal'" - normal is a relative thing. Normal is as normal
does, IMHO. If you believe in yourself and your potential for
accomplishment, then others will as well. It may take awhile to make an
impression that says "I am "able" " but with perserverence, good things
do come.

  Feeling sad/blue about one's lot in life is not exclusive to persons
with disability; simply put, our crosses to bear, if you like, are more
visible than most. Remember this .. we are all people. Nothing more.
Nothing less.

  So, for any of you who are floundering in self-doubt and the "why me,
what if" syndrome(s), get out there and show the ever-elusive "them"
that you are a person of value and that you do count. So there, too!

Cheers!

Carla
http://www.brunnet.net/terrier