Well, Mag, in my life few matters worthwhile have been easy to achieve.
There may be easier, more effective, if less immediate and spectacular, ways
to accomplish my financial goals, and I'm heading in that direction.
Whether or not I get there???

I not sure where ambition edged into obsession.  If I hadn't tried making a
fortune once, I'd've never felt complete as a person.  Having blundered the
opportunity I'm not ready to quit another attempt simply because the getting
is so difficult.

Maybe in the end it's all a matter of bearing discomfort.  Seems we've all
got a one way ticket.  Might as well take interesting side trips.

This has little enough to do with death or worry.  I don't think much about
dying.  I care much about what I do with my life and how I come to terms
with myself in the process.  I do not worry about money, I've enough to get
by comfortably.  The fear and pressure from stock market volatility are
necessary concomitants of assessing risk.  I'm more wary of losing myself
than any money the "market" can take.  I more regret the limits on my time,
health, and energy keep me from the versatility that marked my salad days.

Wait 'til you reach 50, everything truncates.

Thanks for your kindness and support.

Hopefully the dialogue can help us all.

s.
------

Date:    Mon, 1 Feb 1999 02:13:56 EST
From:    Magenta Raine <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: Re: Missed Opportunities

steve, if it's so stressful, why not get out of the crazy market?   you
don't
get to take your money with you when you die, so why worry about having a
million bucks?

mag