You said:
Much of our anger comes in how we were raised.
If you never learned how to express it- just bottle it up and hide all real
emotion merely putting on a fase front.


Sooo true. It does become a viscious cycle. I will assume that you dont
handle anger well because your parents either didn't handle it well either
as you were growing up. Where do you think we learn these techniques from?
Mom and Pop. Everyone has things in our lives that make us angry but some
learned how to better manage it by watching how mom and dad dealt with it(
if done appropriately). As a parent I know that if I dont learn how to
better manage angry,etc how in the world will my children be able to learn
how to deal with it appropriately.

I take the cognitive approach to anger: Say something happens that is
invoking,,,I feel the anger coming on,,,,,,I say to myself--why am I
angry??,,,,,,,,,What is the emotion that I felt right before I got angry??
(because I believe angry quickly substitutes feelings of hurt, embarrasment,
disrepect,etc) So then I say why do I feel (fill in the blank) and that
usually takes me right to the raw issue of why I converted into anger. Be
honest with yourself and the questions will lead you to your answer.  Do
this everytime you can and what happens over time is you know exactly in a
matter of seconds why you became angry (usually because of hurt,
embarrasment, disrespect,etc). Awareness is the first step of dealing with it..

Now, I havent had therapy but would love too. This is just something that I
read and seems to be working pretty well. Dealing with the sensativity to
the above emotions is what I think I/we need to talk to someone about. Sure
we can manage anger when it comes but can we correct our sensitivities so
that we dont deal with so much anger.

Jason
Kind regards,

Jason Kruse



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Jason Kruse RPAC
Family Practice
Kansas PA Temps
"PA School Review Disk (C)"
email: [log in to unmask]
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