Lucia,
I wasn't able to copy and paste your comment about getting angry to
cover up fear. I think this is true, but the psychological reasons we
create for what we do are really secondary to what's going on
physiologically in the brain. Fear and anger are both normal emotions of
the fight or flight reaction. I didn't find figuring out why I did
something as very helpful in my recovery. I knew that when I felt fear,
it was a sign that anger was trying to emerge and a good time to
recognize that if it was misdirected, I could redirect it toward early
abusers and in that way speed up my healing process.
Ellie