Karl, what you are feeling is normal and whether you believe it or not. Even
thin people feel this way. Everyone fears rejection. It is not a weight
thing. Before I go further I want you to know I am still over 300 lbs and I
recently met the most wonderful woman (5'-4", 145 lbs, red hair, blue
eyes...I would go on but it might start sounding like I am bragging...Aww
what the hell I am bragging. I am DAMN happy about it too!!! HEHE). I would
have never met her if I had not taken that first step to get to know her and
to let her get to know me. I am adding a quote about shyness and it's causes
from one of Frank Wallaces works. You know the source and there is more
information there if you want to go look for it. I won't flood the list with
it all.

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Shyness reduces contact and chances with potential romantic-love partners.
But shyness is easily overcome once the problem is identified. In addition,
the constant misunderstanding of a uniquely different individual may cause
that person to withdraw and become a loner. That aloneness may create an
erroneous image that such a person is shy or a bore when neither is true.

A major step toward eliminating shyness is the acceptance of one's own self.
To do that, one must realize that no "model" person exists with whom anyone
needs to emulate or identify with in order to be healthy, happy, or
successful...A person bypasses shyness by being one's own self in
guiltlessly, proudly producing rational, competitive values in any way he or
she chooses, regardless of what others may say or think.
----------

I also want to recommend you do the following as well. Go to the following
links.

http://www.as.org
http://www.meetmeonline.com
http://www.introserve.com

They are all online singles databases and they are all free. Put your
profile on all of them and be sure and read all the profiles from your area
and pick at least one and respond to it. I think you will find that once you
have responded to one that it gets easier each time. The internet is a great
place to meet women and it saves you the time and effort of having to go and
look for them. Plus it is much easier to get to know someone initially
through e-mail than it is in person. Don't be afraid of blind dates either.
I happen to love them myself. It is one of the most exciting things in the
world because you never know what you are getting into. It is like getting a
gift. You just can't wait to unwrap the damn thing.

Last but not least. Don't worry about being rejected. I will tell you right
now that you will be. We all are at some time or another. That is part of
life and the sooner you learn to deal with it the better. I look at
rejection as a tool for selection. Once rejected the field for selection is
narrowed. Also expect the unexpected. When I met the woman I described
previously I had seen her picture in a profile and I sent her this message.

        I don't think that I am the guy you are looking for but I just
wanted to tell you something you are probably already aware of but I think
you are a beautiful young woman.

        That was all I said. I never even expected to hear anything back
from her and now we can't get enough of each other.

        Later,

        Roger

Nature forms us for ourselves, not for others; to be, not to seem.

                                              -- Unknown Author --

"I swear -- by my life and my love of it -- that I will never live for the
sake of another man, nor ask another man to live for mine"

                                      -- Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged, 1957 --

"The further the spiritual evolution of mankind advances, the more certain
it seems to me that the path to genuine religiosity does not lie through
the fear of life, and the fear of death, and blind faith, but through
striving after rational knowledge."

                                                           -- Einstein --