>Tierra said:
>>-Peter, a much better way to describe it would be *a willingness to
>>yield.* There was something so different about the experience, that
>>was totally unexpected to me. I raised the heavy metal pipe to strike
>>the rabbit once, but was unable to let to fall the first time, but the
>>second time there was, as it felt to me, a calming and accepting
>>energy that passed between the rabbit and I, at which time I let the
>>pipe fall.

>Peter said:
>I still do not buy it. If you had not felt that accepting energy my
>guess is that you would have felt pretty guilty. If killing animals is
>a natural human act, as I believe it is, you will (re)learn with time
>to kill without needing their "permission."

Kirt:
There are at least a couple things more to consider here. One is that the
emotional charge of killing/eating (especially a mammal) is _very_ high.
Knowing how to "properly deal with" the experience is pretty hard
(especially when there may be nothing much to "deal with" as much as there
is just staying open to the full experience itself). It is not surprising
with such an emotional charge experienced in an adult (who was probably
quite concerned about the morality of the whole episode) that she could
slip into spiritual stuff. It is likely that Tierra needed her own
permission to kill the rabbit, more than she needed the rabbit's
permission. In any case, sharing her experience on veg-raw takes some
courage. I was happy she shared it as well as that Peter called her on what
he considered false tones. Interesting exchange!

The other thing is that there is likely a fairly evolved sex difference as
regards killing/hunting. Nothing can be assumed from Tierra's episode, of
course, but in most recent hunter-gatherers it is the males who hunt
(though there are significant exceptions). There is some talk that the
repressive mechanism evolved in, say, hunting cats prevents such violence
within a family. The maternal instinct and its potential misappplication to
other mammals (which would screw up the hunt!) is kind of a "problem" in
the evolution of the brain structures. How a lion can take down a young
wounded antelope and then play with the kittens at home is an interesting
phenomena, and perhaps evolved as a "niche mental subroutine". The idea
that, in humans, males specialize in this "subroutine" is not preposterous
to me.

FWIW, Melisa seems to have little desire to kill an animal (say at the San
Diego Wild Animal Park) though she will more or less lick her lips at the
idea that she could eat it. My experience is that the "licking of my lips"
is deeply braided with the urge to hunt/kill. This tells more about Melisa
and I than about human sex differences I suppose, but the whole issue is
one I am eager to hear more folks' experience about as I grow older and
humbler...

Anyway, Tierra, don't let Peter scare you off from sharing what's going on
with you! :) Whenever one experiences something "totally unexpected" it is
usually a pointer to something damn interesting. It will be interesting one
day to hear Peter's "first kill" story ;)

Cheers,
Kirt