Dear John,
I love those and I did save them. lol.
Thanks so much for sharing.
Thanks much.
Many Blessings,
Pat Ferguson
"I can Do all Things Through Christ Who Strengthens Me" Philippians 4:13.
At 07:50 AM 1/10/2015, you wrote:
>Some old, some new.
>
>text of forwarded message follows:
>>From: Hand In Hand <[log in to unmask]>
>>
>>*A SPECIAL KIND OF HUMOR*
>>
>>*LOT'S WIFE *The Sunday School teacher was
>>describing how Lot's wife looked back and
>>turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason
>>interrupted, "My Mummy looked back once while
>>she was driving," he announced triumphantly,
>>"and she turned into a telephone pole!"
>>
>>*GOOD SAMARITAN* A Sunday school teacher was
>>telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan.
>>
>>She asked the class, "If you saw a person lying
>>on the roadside, all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"
>>
>>A thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd throw up."
>>
>>
>>*DID NOAH FISH? *A Sunday school teacher asked,
>>"Johnny, do you think Noah did a lot of fishing when he was on the Ark?"
>>
>>"No," replied Johnny. "How could he, with just two worms."
>>
>>*HIGHER POWER *A Sunday school teacher said to
>>her children, "We've been learning how po
>>powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a Higher Power.
>>
>>Can anybody tell me what it is?"
>>
>>One child blurted out, "Aces!"
>>
>>
>>*MOSES AND THE RED SEA *Nine-year-old Joey was
>>asked by his mother what he had learned in Sunday School.
>>
>>"Well, Mum, our teacher told us how God sent
>>Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to
>>lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he
>>reached the Red Sea, he had his army build a
>>pontoon bridge and all the people walked across
>>safely. Then he radioed headquarters for
>>reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up
>>the bridge and all the Israelites were saved."
>>
>>"Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?" his Mother asked.
>>
>>"Well, no, Mum, but, if I told it the way the
>>teacher did, you'd never believe it!"
>>
>>
>>*THE LORD IS MY SHEPHERD *A Sunday School
>>teacher decided to have her young class
>>memorise one of the most quoted passages in the Bible� *Psalm
>>23*.
>>
>>She gave the youngsters a month to learn the chapter.
>>
>>Little Rick was excited about the task but he
>>just couldn't rremember the Psalm. *
>>
>>After much practice, he could barely get past the first line.
>>
>>On the day that the kids were scheduled to
>>recite Psalm 23 in front of the congregation, Ricky was so nervous.
>>
>>When it was his turn, he stepped up to the
>>microphone and said proudly, "The Lord is my
>>Shepherd, and that's all I need to know."
>>
>>
>>*UNANSWERED PRAYER *The preacher's
>>five-year-old daughter noticed that her father
>>always paused and bowed his head for a moment before starting his sermon.
>>
>>One day, she asked him why.
>>
>>"Well, Honey," he began, proud that his
>>daughter was so observant of his messages. "I'm
>>asking the Lord to help me preach a good sermon."
>>
>>"How come He doesn't answer it?" she asked.
>>
>>
>>*BEING THANKFUL *A Rabbi said to a precocious
>>six-year-old boy, "So your mother says your
>>prayers for you each night? That's very commendable. What does she say?"
>>
>>The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"
>>
>>
>>*UNTIMELY ANSWERED PRAYER *During the
>>minister's prayer one Sunday, there was a loud
>>whistle from one of the back pews.
>>
>>Tommy's mother was horrified.
>>
>>She pinched him into silence and, after church,
>>asked, "Tommy, whatever made you do such a thing?"
>>
>>Tommy answered soberly, "I asked God to teach me to whistle, and He did!"
>>
>>
>>*TIME TO PRAY *A pastor asked a little boy if
>>he said his prayers every night.
>>
>>"Yes, Sir." the boy replied.
>>
>>"And, do you always say them in the morning, too?" the pastor asked.
>>
>>"No sir," the boy replied. "I ain't scared in the daytime"
>>
>>
>>*ALL MEN / ALL GIRLS *When my daughter, Kelli,
>>said her bedtime prayers, she would bless every
>>family member, every friend, and every animal (*current and past*).
>>
>>For several weeks, after we had finished the
>>nightly prayer, Kelli would say, "And all girls."
>>
>>This soon became part of her nightly routine, to include this closing.
>>
>>My curiosity had the better of me and I asked
>>her, "Kelli, why do you always add the part about all girls?"
>>
>>Her response, "Because everybody always finish
>>their prayers by saying 'All Men'!"
>>
>>
>>*SAY A PRAYER* Little Johnny and his family
>>were having Sunday dinner at his Grandmother's house.
>>
>>Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served.
>>
>>When Little Johnny received his plate, he started eating right away.
>>
>>"Johnny! Please wait until we say our prayer." said his mother.
>>
>>"I don't need to," the boy replied. "Of course,
>>you do" his mother insisted. "We always say a
>>prayer before eating at our house." "That's at
>>our house." Johnny explained. "But this is
>>Grandma's house and she knows how to cook!"
>text of forwarded message ends:
>
>John
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