Down under one corner of the house, look up under the box sill, you'll 
find a little flap of rubber hanging down. Pull on it a little and 
you'll see it's tied into a knot. Hold above the knot with your thumb 
and index finger, then untie the knot, but keep holding above, real 
tight. Now, here's the easy part, with your other thumb and finger 
stretch the rubber sideways and a little air will escape, making a 
little squeaking sound. Stretch looser and the squeak is more like a low 
squawk, stretch tighter and you get a nice high pitched squeaky squeak. 
Now, here's the tricky part, experiment with the pitch and you'll soon 
notice that the nails in the joists vibrate a little, you don't want 
that. A little lower pitch is good, then the nuts on the tie bolts that 
fasten the sill plate to the foundation will vibrate. Then get a little 
harmonic going, squeaky berrrr-berrr-zeeeeeky, and the nuts will loosen 
and twirl right up and off the bolts. Now, here's the dangerous part, 
let go of the flap of rubber and get out of there as fast as you can. 
Don't worry about the "flabby, flabby" sound, that's just all the air 
rushing out the flap of rubber. Get yourself outside quick, on the other 
side of the house from where you want it to be, then just lean on the 
wall of the house. The flabby air acts like a little jet that slightly 
lifts the building and you just ease it over to where you want it, 
little at a time, but you have to pay attention and not wander all about 
the neighborhood with it, just go straight to the new location for the 
house, because there only a limited supply of air in a house with 
balloon-framing.

John (the building innovation switch has no off position) Leeke

Non-Warrantee: Your mileage may vary, don't water-proof your screens, 
don't do anything your mommy told you not to.

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