I feel shipwrecked in many ways. I am hanging on to the Robe of
Jesus; crying out, "Savior, I need you." In many ways I wonder if I will
be able to ever get past this devastating illness of my soul? I cry out
because I am so dry and depleted of the simple basic needs at times to
just make it. Then it seems when I am given something it is soaked up
so fast cause the need is so great. I would so hope to be more
independent and able to support my own needs. Sometimes death
seems a welcomed friend just because I feel like I have attempted
everything to overcome. I feel trapped into a survival existence that
leaves me forever frustrated with my condition. I so understand the
one that commits suicide or hurts themselves. Not the best solution by
far. But I do understand the temptation to entertain it even for a
second. Was looking through my address book for just anyone to have
coffee with yesterday. Whew....friends are bountiful in my life, but very
sparse at the same time.
Tee