Continued from #2...
Everyone is either in the position of leader or follower in life. 
Opportunities have been set up by God to lead or follow as in marriage, 
family, church,  in work, and in society. The very same principle elements 
that Jesus displayed in the garden between a follower and a leader are the 
very same principles that people should be striving to demonstrate and 
hold accountable in their own life. Determining when to lead and when to 
follow is not based upon an individual's history or abilities. Because 
they were a leader in the last church doesn't mean they are a leader in 
the current one. Because they were a supervisor in their last job, does 
not mean they will automatically be supervisor in the new one. Likewise 
just because an individual is the most able and the most qualified doesn't 
make them the leader. That mustn't be confused, that does not determine 
whether an individual will lead or whether they follow. Many people have 
leadership ability without having the leadership position. Someone who is 
a genuine leader,  possesses leadership ability,  and especially someone 
with leadership history, must watch to ensure they are not found leading 
when they are suppose to be following.  This is especially true in a 
marriage. Many  times the woman is the more capable leader, and has a 
proven leadership track record, but that does not give her the leadership 
position. She needs to be very watchful that she is not caught leading 
when she should be following, because the position of following is the 
position that was given her in a marriage by God. The leadership 
tendencies, abilities or history an individual possesses is irrelevant to 
the position that God placed in a marriage. If you are male and you are 
married, you're the leader, then you must lead. A leader is responsible 
for leading. If you're a woman, you are a follower, then  you must follow. 
A follower is responsible for following. In a marriage Jesus said wives 
obey your husbands in everything as unto the Lord. Again concerning 
marriage, Jesus says wives submit to your own husbands in everything, even 
if they are wrong. Peter said "Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own 
husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, 
may be won by the conduct of their wives" 1 Peter 3:1 NKJV. This is 
instruction for godly behavior.  What is godly behavior for followers? To 
follow their leaders. That is considered godly behavior.  What then is 
followers not following leaders, or concerning  1 Peter 3:1, the sometimes 
unpopular topic of wives lacking submission to their husbands? That is 
ungodly behavior.

If an individual has the ability and history of leading, without 
submission, following will prove itself too difficult for them, because 
one day they will come to a time when they believe they are right and 
their leader is wrong, do not trust what their leader says, or just do not 
want to do what their leader says to do, and the waters of their 
relationship will be troubled. In order to follow Jesus' example, they 
will need submission. The follower may find themselves exercising all the 
avenues of counsel by bringing  to the table all of the information, 
ability, history and even evidence that they are right, and still face 
their leader saying to do it anyway. Perhaps in their employment situation 
they are smarter, more able to lead, have more history of leading and more 
credibility, but that does not make them the leader. Certainly they ought 
to bring their wisdom, their counsel their pleading, bring their 
evidence  of charts, their numbers, their friends, and everything they may 
have to present their case, however, when their leader says to do it 
anyway, then Jesus' example demands they abandon their position and take 
up that of their leader's by  submission. They have to believe in God's 
law   more than they believe in their right.

There is also illegitimate leadership. It makes a difference often times 
in how followers treat those who have arrived at a  level of power, 
position or leadership authority. I am a pastor, a leader of a church, but 
never did God give me the authority to say who could marry another. Nor 
did he give instruction to anyone that they should ask me, although people 
have and do. I have no authority there however. For me to assume that 
authority is for me to embrace illegitimate power and leadership which 
they presented to me in their life. The Bible has never shown an example 
of any two people standing before a priest or man of God to be married, it 
is honoring to God, we practice it, and it is wonderful, however, nowhere 
in the Word of God does it give me as a pastor, the authority to decide 
who that person could be. Or over their life in any other way. That is 
between the individual and God. I can give them godly counsel, but I would 
overstep my authority or be attempting to gain illegitimate authority to 
involve myself in decisions of their life in what kind of car they bought, 
what house they bought, where they moved or what they did. Nobody can be 
their, or your Holy Ghost.

However, if someone wanted to teach Sunday school in my church, I have 
both responsibility and authority to instruct him or her to teach what I 
tell them, or they do not teach. It would be easy for them to obey when 
they want to teach what I tell them, but when they do not want to teach 
what I tell them, obedience becomes more challenging and they will need to 
find submission. When they do find submission I hope they have also found 
Loyalty. I hope they are loyal to not complain about it to others, because 
that will work against it and the authority given me.  the difference 
between a dictator and a strong leader is a matter of perspective. For a 
daddy to tell his son that  yes he is going to be in by midnight, is 
not  dictatorial, it's the responsible voice of a strong leader, he has a 
right to say that. No one likes to be told no, but everybody has been told 
no, and when they are told no, they will find out if the leader has the 
right and if they, as the follower, are submitted and loyal. If we want to 
follow our example in Jesus as a godly follower, then we will embrace not 
only obedience, but we will embrace submission and we will embrace 
loyalty. We will work on all three of these qualities.

Continued on  the final mail #4...