amen brad!
Jen and MAMA-Star
"Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble 
remembering how to fly."
Author unknown
AIM: jenibear1998
msn
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----- Original Message ----- 
From: "MV" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Wednesday, January 11, 2006 7:34 AM
Subject: Re: George Update


> Phil,
>
> From what I know of it, I'd agree Vivian is having issue of not dealing
> with  Jennifer's death very much so, and turning about and accusing George
> of it. Likely out of her own  wonder of why she can't shrug it off. In
> other words it is so hard to her, and she is trying to rely on George, and
> he too is suffering, and so she accuses him. I've been in similar, albeit
> not in a death situation but the blame for something the other was 
> actually
> doing.  Having lost my brother at age 38, and watching my parents deal 
> with
> it, losing a child is a very tough thing. In fact I've heard from a few
> sources that dealing with a child's death is one of, if not the worst,
> emotional issue to go through. More than divorce, more than a loss of a
> parent as you tent to get survivor's guilt and etc. From that knowledge
> alone I  know Vivian is suffering, and there is no shame in  that. 
> Jennifer
> was their only flesh and blood product out of a love for each other, and I
> suppose there are emotional/mental aspects to that in reverse which tend 
> to
> affect the relationship too if not sorted out proper, or if God isn't
> allowed to heal that too without constant rejuvenating it in their minds.
> In all that I also can tend to see Vivian may have other issues prior to
> this which are being accentuated now. I've been to a point of  "just not
> being able to take it anymore", ready and willing to just give up the
> marriage, it  was for me, emotional horror and extremely dark 
> spiritually.
> And I didn't have a challenge with depression at the time, well I was
> depressed due to the situation no doubt, I didn't even want to go to work
> as we were also in financial  deep waters and it all seemed so pointless,
> but I wasn't clinically depressed as it were. Anyway, all that to say I
> feel for him, and Vivian too as one has to look past the initial situation
> or obvious behavior of beating down a depressed man to a point of 
> seriously
> considering divorce, which if he does, likely comes with it's own set of
> emotional failures, and particularly with George, the family and friends
> ought use wisdom to keep watch for signs of suicidal thoughts/plans. 
> People
> tend to behave in certain ways when they have made a decision from what
> I've heard and seen.  May God pull that marriage together and rip the 
> hands
> of the enemy off it, and heal the hurt and blame for something that wasn't
> their fault in any way.
>
> Brad
>
>
> At 11:03 PM 1/10/2006 -0700, you wrote:
>>Please pray for George.  He is in pretty bad emotional shape.  He wrote me
>>last week and told me he promised his wife that he would no longer have 
>>any
>>contact with me.  It didn't help.  She is pounding him into the ground 
>>that
>>he is not being successful and not overcoming the death of their daughter.
>>His sister, in Minnesota, called me today and told me that George thinks 
>>he
>>will go se a divorce lawyer this week because he cannot take it any more.
>>Plus, his wife had deleted my phone numbers from George's cell phone.  His
>>sister called to get my cell and home numbers straightened out so she 
>>could
>>give them to her brother.  My hand on the Bible, one of the worst things a
>>person can do his pound on a depressed person.  His sister said at least
>>this time he isn't talking about suicide so praise God for that.  He is a
>>broken man, though, and he loves his wife.  So do I, for that matter, and
>>that's why I keep praying for her.  I am just praying that his wife comes
>>face to face with the God of the universe so she can be healed from the 
>>rage
>>that is in her.  Make no mistake about it, that's what it is, too, rage 
>>and
>>rage against God for not sparing her daughter from death.
>>
>>Phil.
>>
>>
>>Jesus Is Your Problem Not The Devil.  Luke 12:5
>>www.SafePlaceFellowship.com
>
> Brad
>
>   God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, not his extra
>
>
>
> At 11:03 PM 1/10/2006 -0700, you wrote:
>>Please pray for George.  He is in pretty bad emotional shape.  He wrote me
>>last week and told me he promised his wife that he would no longer have 
>>any
>>contact with me.  It didn't help.  She is pounding him into the ground 
>>that
>>he is not being successful and not overcoming the death of their daughter.
>>His sister, in Minnesota, called me today and told me that George thinks 
>>he
>>will go se a divorce lawyer this week because he cannot take it any more.
>>Plus, his wife had deleted my phone numbers from George's cell phone.  His
>>sister called to get my cell and home numbers straightened out so she 
>>could
>>give them to her brother.  My hand on the Bible, one of the worst things a
>>person can do his pound on a depressed person.  His sister said at least
>>this time he isn't talking about suicide so praise God for that.  He is a
>>broken man, though, and he loves his wife.  So do I, for that matter, and
>>that's why I keep praying for her.  I am just praying that his wife comes
>>face to face with the God of the universe so she can be healed from the 
>>rage
>>that is in her.  Make no mistake about it, that's what it is, too, rage 
>>and
>>rage against God for not sparing her daughter from death.
>>
>>Phil.
>>
>>
>>Jesus Is Your Problem Not The Devil.  Luke 12:5
>>www.SafePlaceFellowship.com
> Brad
>
>   You are richer today if you have laughed, given, or forgiven
>
>
>
> At 11:03 PM 1/10/2006 -0700, you wrote:
>>Please pray for George.  He is in pretty bad emotional shape.  He wrote me
>>last week and told me he promised his wife that he would no longer have 
>>any
>>contact with me.  It didn't help.  She is pounding him into the ground 
>>that
>>he is not being successful and not overcoming the death of their daughter.
>>His sister, in Minnesota, called me today and told me that George thinks 
>>he
>>will go se a divorce lawyer this week because he cannot take it any more.
>>Plus, his wife had deleted my phone numbers from George's cell phone.  His
>>sister called to get my cell and home numbers straightened out so she 
>>could
>>give them to her brother.  My hand on the Bible, one of the worst things a
>>person can do his pound on a depressed person.  His sister said at least
>>this time he isn't talking about suicide so praise God for that.  He is a
>>broken man, though, and he loves his wife.  So do I, for that matter, and
>>that's why I keep praying for her.  I am just praying that his wife comes
>>face to face with the God of the universe so she can be healed from the 
>>rage
>>that is in her.  Make no mistake about it, that's what it is, too, rage 
>>and
>>rage against God for not sparing her daughter from death.
>>
>>Phil.
>>
>>
>>Jesus Is Your Problem Not The Devil.  Luke 12:5
>>www.SafePlaceFellowship.com
>
> Brad
>
>   There is a difference between having a problem, and being a problem