George recently got DSL in the little town where they live.  I have not
talked to him on the phone for probably three weeks or maybe longer.  His
wife still doesn't want him calling or communicating with me.  Yes, she
still checks on his emails to see who he has been writing to.  George,
however, seems to be doing very well.  He has been working for the passed
three months or so at Walmart and seems to be getting along pretty well over
all.  As is so often the case, this time of year likely won't be too easy
for them since this will be their daughters first Christmas in Heaven.
Below is an article George just wrote.  I've posted it on my website, too.

Do We Really Believe and Why Not?

     I am writing this with the true attitude of how some of us
believe, but do not show or really say but keep it buried,
sometimes possibly for years, until we finally crack. I will say
that all in this article is based on true life experiences.

     First I want to address the issue of Jesus Christ as our Lord
and personal savior. I have been saved since I was 18 years old
and am 48 years old now. I will give you a brief history of my
life and will get to the jest of the article.

     When I was 16 my brother Bill was killed in a motorcycle
accident in Fontana California. He was soon to be 18 in 6 days. My
father who's name was also Bill died when I was 23 and he was 64
and he died of Cancer. My mother Alice died when I was 28 of
pulmonary embolism to the right lung she was 67.  Needless to say
this was the beginning of a 3 year spiral of depression that was
keeping me at the point of suicide constantly. I, as do many
Christians, just tried to tough it out and get over it. The
depression didn't lift until I was 46 years old but deep down I
constantly had a nagging of my real true relationship with the
Lord and didn't know why.  Well next was my sister Jeanne who
passed away of upper raspatory cancer when I was 46 she was 62.
Now the straw that broke the camel's back was my daughter Jennifer
that passed away April 11th 2005 she was 23 I am 48. Where is
Jesus? I said where is Jesus? Many of you have been where I have
been and are under so much stress and depression you just can't
stand it anymore.

     Let me give you the intent of my article. The Apostles, after
Jesus had been crucified were so depressed and scared they locked
themselves in a room. Sounds like what I did. The reason they did
this is because they thought Jesus was dead and all there hopes
were dashed to pieces. Read the Gospels and you will find this is
true. Even though they had walked with him for 3 and a half years
they were still scared. Why? I will tell you why. They needed a
personal encounter with the Lord. Not just someone telling them
about him like Mary Magdalene did. She said I have seen the Lord
they did not believe her. the 2 men on the road to Emmaus saw him
and reported what they saw. They still didn't believe. When did
the Apostles believe? When Jesus appeared to them in the locked
room where they were and, Bingo!  They believed because they saw
him and were overjoyed he was alive and then they could believe
everything else he had said. Do you think Jesus was upset because
they had to see him to believe? Absolutely not.

     Now let's consider another area that preacher's and
minister's have truly, yes I said truly crippled the body of
Christ. By saying things like if you need to see Jesus then, bless
God, you don't believe. Or we walk by faith and not by sight and
if you have to see to believe then you're not a real Christian. Or
they will say and talk about him as if he was the only one that
did not believe. None of them believed until they saw him. Even
Paul the Apostle didn't believe until he saw him.  Let's go back
to the Apostles and realize that after they saw Him, they
believed. What is wrong with you and I seeing Jesus in this
present day? Absolutely  nothing. I have asked him many times to
see him and just the other night  an angel appeared on my side of
the bed while I was asleep and my wife  saw it. Churches are
crippling the body of Christ by preaching that we  don't need
experiences with Jesus just believe.  It's not right. He is  no
respecter of person's. If he wanted to appear to the Apostles he
wants to appear to you. If you are at a place where I am at now
with all  the death that has occurred, then just tell him Lord I
need to see to  believe.  Forget about what anybody says and even
what your church  teaches. Go to Jesus personally and tell him
what you need. I always  thought he would get mad at me for asking
something like that. Guess who  taught me that rubbish? You
guessed it all the well meaning ministers  and preachers. My
daughter's passing was the catalyst that almost drove  me out of
my mind and caused me to fall into depression so severe.

     I  have went through 2 years of intercessory prayer with my
friend Phil  Scovell and Jesus came and gave me truth and expelled
the lies of the  enemy. He even appeared to me in many of the
prayer sessions which was a  great relief to me. If I hadn't gone
through that I surely would have  committed suicide at the passing
of my daughter. I never dreamed we would  be without our
daughter. Yes she is in Heaven but you know I live here  and it's
tough without her. And I will tell you why. I am not Mr.
Spiritual as some try to be and then crash and burn. I have told
the  Lord I need to see you like the Apostles saw you and he is
not mad at me  and I am not ashamed to have asked him. I pray this
will take some of  you to a place you will ask the Lord to give
you what you need because  you are struggling so hard. If you want
to call my friend Phil and ask  him about me please do so. He has
been where I have been also.

     Now for  the scriptural references to prove what I have said:

Luke 24 the whole chapter  John 20 and 21 the whole chapter  Mark
16 the whole chapter  Acts chapter 9 the whole chapter  1st
Corinthians 9:1  Acts 7:55-60.

Sincerely;  Your faithful brother and servant to Jesus,

George S. Roberts

Victory Isn't Something You Have; It Is Who You Are.
www.SafePlaceFellowship.com