Py -

What would you have expected from a carpenter's son?  Wonderful story!!  It
reminds me a bit of Tom Robbins "Another Roadside Attraction", only your
visitor was breathing.

- Pam
----- Original Message -----
From: "Becker, Dan" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Tuesday, May 31, 2005 09:51
Subject: [BP] FW: The True Cross


> Forwarded for Py: the listserv robot is choking on the length of this
> one, so the usual Py disclaimers apply...print out, read at your
> leisure, etc., etc.
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: [log in to unmask] [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
> Sent: Tuesday, May 31, 2005 9:43 AM
> To: Becker, Dan
> Subject: Re: Problem processing mail file from [log in to unmask]
>
>
>
> La croix Vrai
>
> (the true cross )
> The True Cross
>
> The Natchez trace is as old as time. Once a migratory path for the
> Mastodon and the three toed sloth . this  Trans regional highway is now
> circuitous route for sportsmen , tourists, and pilgrims of the faith
> who believe  that there are roads for  nature just as there are for
> commerce and progress . .
>
> This road is completely without the signage and the trappings of
> civilization ;.
> and that is precisely why  I prefer to travel it   every chance I get .
> Once upon it , I can set my car on cruise control  to the obligatory 50
> mph or less , tune in some Delta blues and watch the  world go by  in
> the bucolic scenery  of the forest and hill country of rural
> Mississippi. .
>  Here there is no   stop and go traffic.
>  No  lights,  no clover leafs ,no  commercial trucks , fast food  signs
> or gas stops . In fact there is hardly any signs telling you where you
> are and that is just perfect for my wanderlust .,., .
> No ,here only slowpokes are allowed  and   the only tailgating to be
> found   are the deer and wild  turkey that    feed   by the road side...
> .
>
>  This famous route flows through the  entire length of the state and
> harbors a safe zone for all wildlife not to mention bicyclists who
> migrate here from all over the globe  to enjoy the freedom  ,and beauty
> of its  open road
> They like the hikers and horsemen  that join them share in the value of
> such park like  passage as a national treasure, a heritage if you will,
> given to them from  a  generation now long past who manifested the
> rights of this road  during the depths of the depression as something
> else they could show the world besides a medieval reputation over race
> and religion . .
>
> In prehistoric times it was an migratory animal trail, followed by the
> aboriginals and later the fur traders that dealt in the commerce of the
> woodland culture  that made their home here .
>   .A national path from the Carolinas to Natchez where once you arrived
> ,  it became a somewhat easy float down the Mississippi  to New Orleans
> and the shores of the Gulf . . .  A  route infamous for pirates and
> brigands  ,horse thieves  and gypsy merchants of every race and color
> who followed the migratory path of the frontiersmen then traders then
> settlers;  stopping off at watering holes and trade posts with names
> like  Pigeons roost , Monroe Mission ,Witches Dance, French Camp  and
> Emerald mound .
> Few roads from early America exist such as this one .
> One with a history of  stories  worthy of telling and  retelling about
> the  expansion of what was then the west  and  the migration  of newly
> arrived peoples to what was then known as  the Louisiana Purchase . .
>
> It seems like every time I travel  the Trace   I  experience something
> new
> . Once there was a bicycle rider atop an 1890's big wheel,  little wheel
> bike, that took a step ladder to get on board . He managed  20 miles a
> day and his only real challenge   was getting down from it .
> Another vehicle  I recall  was a home made  Stanley steamer  rolling
> along at a record breaking 35 mph puffing away  with the pedal to the
> metal. Then there was the time I saw a hybrid solar car. This
> contraption of plastic and bailing wire hummed along with its driver at
> a whopping  48 mph.(on a sunny day that is)
>
> The Natchez Trace seems to be a magnet  for the unusual and that is
> because it is the most protected ,safe,  unencumbered   road I know   to
> try out  any mode of  transportation  (including two feet ) that doesn't
> ex cell  50 mph..  .
>
> Here one can always   expect the unexpected ,. and so I was not
> disappointed  when over the memorial day  I passed   a man in white
> robes wearing a crown of thorns navigating  a huge cross upon  his
> shoulder, and  making his way down the bike path of the   highway.
>
> " Woa" am I seeing this ?
> Since there are many who profess to be  cross bearers in this life  , I
> will cut to the quick and say this is the first  time I have actually
> ever saw  one let alone meet  one and thinking it might be my only
> chance at real  salvation, I asked myself "Why not"  , take a chance,
> ....stop  and offer what assistance  I could.;  after all aren't we all
> pilgrims on the path ?
>
> Well more on that later .
> The fact is normally I do not stop for strangers.
> But since he  was such a  familiar figure  in the historic sence , I
> decided in good faith  that the  value of  being a good Samaritan might
> resonate  with him  and well you know  after all if I can't score with
> him  with acts of kindness who can I score with  .
>  I had to take a chance , Besides my attendance  record  for  Sunday
> services  has been spotty , and I have been having a lot of indecent
> sexual thoughts  over a Playboy I keep in the small room   so if  ever
> there was a chance to make amends  then this was it  .
>
> "Strike while the iron is hot" my teacher always said , or was that my
> girlfriend ? Hmmm....Never mind
>
> I nudged my wagon  off to the side of  the road  and waited for my
> cross-bearer to catch up .  This gave me time to think about what I'm
> actually doing . Lone men wearing robes and thorns in the forest  can be
> trouble  so I checked to see if the Billy club was still under the front
> seat ..  It was .
>
> Comforted that we were at least on equal terms as far as life on the
> physical was concerned ,
> I then began thinking of what I might say to him once he arrived . ..
> "Hey bub  need a lift ? "just wasn't going to make it Besides what if he
> was for real? Stranger things have happened here on the Trace  ..
>
> I mean here I am in the middle of no where , Big Foot country surrounded
> by a sundry population  who believe in   walk ins and UFOs speaking in
> country  accents,eating grits ,collards and corn bread and waiting for
> HIM all the time , and ...well ....here He is  ,
> The very thought that it might be HIM was a distinct possibility
> And who could say for sure?
>
> So I began searching my brain for appropriate greetings  . First that
> came to mind was something confessional....  "Forgive me father  ,for I
> have sinned "  but I canned that because I didn't want to show all my
> cards at once .
>
> Then came a little something more gentle from the Beatitudes ....
> "Blessed are the Greeks , for they shall"...
> ..no...no you Bozo   that wasn't it either ....
> Why is it when you meet famous people you can never think of something
> to say ?.... .  "Counselor ,  forgive me .. I err ...rest my case"
> I was still fishing around for a proper greeting   when he arrived
> bearing his cross and perspiring in the noon day heat .
> His cross looked like a lot to bear ,
> I had seen something similar to it at the San Gernarno festival in
> little Italy NYC on the saints feast day but that one  had a lot of
> dollars pinned to it and it was carried by 8  gorillas in tuxedos.
>  No this one was bigger but there was something  different about it .
>
> "Thanks for stopping brother" ,he said almost  bashfully   handing me a
> small pamphlet while catching his breath .
> I felt as if I had been given one of those pamphlets you get outside the
> subway , only instead of saying Vote Today or eat here in Chinese  it
> was an advertisement  of his church asking me if Id been Saved ,  with
> his  preachers  phone number hand  written in the page corner  as the
> old one that was printed wasn't any good..
>
> Dumbstruck I perused  the information as if it were the spread sheet
> sad for the 5th race .
> I was sad  yet somewhat   relieved  I had met Santa's helper rather than
> Santa himself .
> You know that  feeling  when you go into meetings unprepared . I mean
> this might be the biggest client  of your whole career,  the guy who is
> going to carry you over for an eternity .  The golden parachute and your
> going to blow it not being prepared? Not so fast Buster I thought to
> myself .  I  gotta do my homework;.  I  want to be sure I know all the
> genuflections ,  creeds and buzz words  not seen the Mel Gibson movie.
> I wanna know for sure .
>
> Admittedly I am petrified  of being  blessed ,saved ,and  healed  all at
> once.
> Its like signing up for the six pack abs at the training  Gym  , you
> gotta die to get there.. Besides being saved I wouldn't  recognize
> myself, and nobody  in my  old neighborhood would know me ..
> Not sure  of anything   I blurted out the first thing that came to
> mind..
>
> "Nice thorns ".... I said breaking the ice and admiring  the cheap,
> plastic rubber tipped wreath that encased his head . "Oh  yeah " he
> commented removing them from his brow and wiping off the sweat  with the
> cuff of his robe .
>
> Since the thorns were  the kind suitable for traveling I guess he
> brushed off  the compliment  off  like it was no big thing.
> But more than that ,  his movement of the robe   afforded me the odd
> chance to  peek   inside his  robe which revealed not the saintly
> stigmata I had hoped for but   a  pair of very  skinny pale  white legs
> held up by a pair of  bright Bermuda shorts topped by a  immigrant tee
> shirt  with Nascar logos .
>
> I have seen a lot in this world . People and places that make the mid
> east look like a resort area.,but this was one of those times I had to
> pinch myself .  The shorts of course  did nothing for his persona , or
> my impression of him ,but at least I could tell he  wasn't armed, so at
> least that hurdle was over .
>
> His sandals are what got me ,  They  were impressive.
> . No  wandering in the desert  on hush puppy's for this disciple  ,
> What adorned those unwashed feet were a pair of   high tech
> Birkenstocks  capable of the Shell torture test from Morocco to Dakar.
> .
> "Been traveling far ? " I asked... eyeing the sandals as if they were
> spinner hubs
>   . .
> "Oh about 4 days "   He responded  politely trying to shift gears to my
> salvation . .
>
> I wasn't giving up easy,, playing 3 card monte on the streets of New
> York  can fend off the best of them
>
> "4 days ? Where do you sleep  " I asked hiding the queen again from his
> agenda.
>
> His eyes brightened ...and with that he got excited
> Without saying a word  he whirled his huge cross effortlessly  from the
> padded shoulder harness  to a standing position by the roadside . And as
> a pair of lazy hawks circled overhead  ,he spun the cross  like it was a
> base fiddle for Duke Ellington  during the finale of "Taking the A train
> ".
>
> The cross spun , and as it did so   he began    opening a series of
> hidden panel doors revealing  a design so compartmentalized  that it was
> scarcely  hard to believe .
>  Inside the stations of the cross he had fabricated  a series of storage
> compartments worthy of an east German spy.
> . It revealed a pantry of goods  and  survival gear  to keep him dry and
> fed for a month .. No rabbits out of a hat ,no ladies sawn in half .Just
> expert workmanship .
>
> The  cross itself  was a marvel in camouflage . Constructed  of fire
> rated Styrofoam flashing that was  laminated one upon the other  by high
> strength glues . It appeared as solid wood ,yet inside lay a ca she of
> M- Rations ,sterno cans ,underwear ,tee shirts , to one side  while
> another held a  tarp , tent poles, and mosquito netting while still
> another held  the water and cold drinks with a little side pockets for a
> Walkman and c ds  of ZZ top  and Charlie Daniels and a pull of tobacco..
> .
> Not since the six days  has there ever been  such a   creation
>    Like a quiz  master  he move through each of the  doors enticing me
> the contestant  with some other  clever device he had fabricated  for
> his  journey  .
>
> "Wow " I uttered in disbelief
> "You made all that"
> The   comfort bar in a  Holiday Inn express could not  have done better
> ..
>  the faux bois (false wood ) was perfect.. The whole base was supported
> on high grade swivel wheels made of hard rubber .
> The ball bearings allowed for the spin of the cross .
>
> "Yas suh  " he responded with pride  "
> "It took some doing , altogether on and off about a month"  he said
> opening and closing all the cabinets .reveling other  little cubby holes
> for  toilet paper  toothbrush, mouth wash, pen and paper and of course
> the Good Book  with all his pamphlets and phone numbers so organized and
> accounted for  that one would think he was running numbers for Charlie
> Lucky . . .  I was impressed..  ;  I felt he was a gifted craftsman  and
> that  we finally  had something besides the inevitable  to talk about .
> I offered him a ride  to the next stop which was about an hour of
> getting to know one another
>
> So we loaded him up with the cross sticking half  out the window and
> proceeded down the highway engaging in animated talk  about who was
> saved and who wasn't  ..
> He wearing his crown and the both of us listening to Robert Johnson
> banging back a couple of cold   Yoo Hoos  from what was  for me , dare I
> say it?   ....the True Cross . Py
>
>
>
>
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