Shelly,

Thank you for your explaination of your history. Childhood impressions or
experiences which are unpleasant enough to the child to be blocked out, out
of  defense indeed can come back to cause issues, and medically, yes, the
items you cited, depression meds, and hormonal changes possible, could also
be contributors, but the idea of "I haven't learned and what kind of
Christian am I" are coming from an enemy that wishes you to believe such
and keep you from taking action that will free you. God's word says to
rebuke the enemy and he will flee from you. God also says to focus on what
is good, righteous and all that. A combination of rebuke, prayer, and focus
on what God's word along with addressing the other issues I'd think would
greatly help. We are a triune being, that of spirit, mind and body, and
they are interlinked so majestically by God that sometimes we need to
address issues affecting each one, in order to work out the problem. We can
stand assured knowing what Paul said that we fight against not flesh and
blood, but principalities and powers, that does not mean that we aren't
affected by what we take in our bodies and minds,  ask anyone who drank
enough to find otherwise, or experienced drugs as well, but the point being
it is those forces which cause us to encounter those mind and bodily
intakes, which need to stop the in feeding  as well. Once a person however,
has been subject to imbalances within the body or mind through bad
experiences and expecting similar in the future, they too need be dealt
with. So again dealing with things spiritually, mentally and physically is
very important. My question would be for you to ask yourself, and to answer
yourself and not here unless you decide you wish to share for prayer sake,
but ask yourself which of these areas do you feel needs more attention. Is
it spiritually, which does not constitute it is being covered simply by
seeing a Christian counselor, there are many Christian counselor, some are
counselor who are Christians, and there are Christian counselors which deal
directly with spiritual issues from a biblical perspective. Are you feeding
your mind with thoughts that do not support overcoming these fears? That
too can be addressed through the power of God's word, as well our own will
to refuse to entertain such thoughts when we find ourselves in their midst.
When I quit smoking several years ago, I prayed God help me. And although
you might diminish quitting smoking as not a problem but understand I tried
to quit oh so many times on my own and it was a real problem for me to
function due to its physical affects on me when I quit so much so that I'd
time my quits when I had no major or important decisions to make in life.
But I did quit with God's help, but I too had to maintain a
self-disciplined will to not think of, or entertain the idea of "wouldn't a
smoke be good now?" or "that's right I can't have a smoke now". Constantly
reminding myself I wasn't a smoker was not a positive pattern, but rather
going about life as a smoke free person shunning any thought in a split
second it came up was positive. Also what we take in our bodies is
important. In fact my wife has a book she just got that deals with
nutrition and etc. from a Christian doctor who had depression issues and
etc. I will see if  it is available in PDF format, or some format
accessible, but I'll need a bit of time to find that out. If it is, I'd
highly recommend reading it. I guess I look at it this way, there is a way
out of your predicament, and god knows it, and he is the answer, and please
do not take offense by this comment, but it is a real thing in which can
happen, but folks can choose to hang on to such thoughts because even
though they are traumatic and controlling, it is what they are use to in
life and they take a certain amount of comfort or security in that pattern,
Sounds rediculous I know, but it can happen.  for fear of what they will
have to live up to afterwards which is unknown to them. I see this
intimately with  a very close relative of mine. I'm not suggesting this is
your situation, but merely asking you to check out the possibility. I'll
get back to you on the book when I can find something out.

Blessings,

Brad


Shelly Pryer wrote:
>Brad I almost wrote privately but then I thought that might b otherS
>wondering the same thing re all my stress, so here goes.
>Hmmmm I thought it was going to go now I can't decide where to start.
>As a young child I had several surgeries and procedures that were unpleasant
>well I guess that's obvious grin. nOT LIFE DEVALUING JUST SCAREY FOR  A
>PRESCHOOLER SURGERIES AND SPINAL TAPS, AND SUCH.
>Here's the wierd thing
>I blocked a lot of it out I just had this fear of dr.'s that no one
>including myself could understand. aND I DON'T MEAN SMALL FEAR. mOST 5 AND 6
>YEAR OLDS ARE AFRAID OF MONSTERS UNDER THE BED. i WAS AFRAID OF DR.'S HIDING
>THERE WHO WOULD COME OUT AND HURT ME. But in my late teens I started having
>flashbacks of those early experiences.
>I ended up in therapy for it well and the abuse, and my current relationship
>and...
>
>Anyhow through working with this christian counselor I made a lot of
>progress to the point that normal visits weren't a problem. i won't get in
>to the way I learned to view my fears unless you r really bored and want to
>hear it grin.
>Having been handling things well for the past several years with one
>exeption involving surgery a couple years ago, which wasn't even even this
>stressful, makes this recent what's the word, regression even harder. I can
>say a lot of things to try to make myself feel ok about this recent spacing
>outk, gagging, and panic attack/nightmare period. I can tell myself that
>I've been having bleeding for over a month and that's bound to be doing
>things to my hormones. I can tell myself that I started to suspect in late
>sept that I needed to change my depression meds and i jsut should've done it
>sooner. Or I can tell myself what I have been saying "you must not've really
>learned anything at all." "and what kind of christian r u if u can't even
>trust God with the world's simplest procedure?"
>Shelly
>
>----- Original Message -----
>From: "BD" <[log in to unmask]>
>To: <[log in to unmask]>
>Sent: Monday, January 19, 2004 4:27 PM
>Subject: Re: insanity
>
>
> > Shelly,
> >
> > That is unfortunate. I wonder though, and please do not take this wrongly,
> > but the threshold for traumatic experiences, is that a threshold so low
> > that a normal visit might cause you to think of it as traumatic, or is it
> > so high that indeed your life or quality of it, was threatened each time
> > you visited? There are those that view the glass half full, and those that
> > view it half empty, and then there are those who trim the rim of the glass
> > to where they are at, and view the glass as completely full. That is, to
>be
> > content with where they are at in life or in a situation, and only work up
> > from there, rebuilding the top rim as they go to insure a full glass is
> > always in view. I wonder if going through such a procedure with no
> > expectations of really good or really bad, but just go and complete it,
>and
> > then see if you are able to look at it differently afterwards? Fear has a
> > way of feeding itself, to be afraid of being afraid, as was once said, the
> > only thing to fear is fear itself. The things we imagine or project in a
> > situation, most always, never happen.  These are just some thoughts that
> > perhaps could help to look at. Above all prayer and trust in God to get us
> > through our trials and things of life.
> >
> > Brad