Dear Brother Paul,
Please don't just whine to yourself. If you're afraid of hurting, if you
should find someone and things go wrong, then let's get praying about it.
I'll even phone you if you want! Then you can go out and trust God and,
should the hurts come, well, you'll grow even more in letting Him deal with
them!
It seems it either has to be this way or that you know for you that it is
right that you don't seek a wife because you can do more for the Lord being
single. Which is it?
Let Him show you and then you can move on! This will help you to identify
whether you can't move on, because you still want what God doesn't want, or
if you can't move on because you may be hurt if you do . . ..
HTH - and keep talking, even if privately! <SMILE>
--
Carol
----- Original Message -----
From: "lion ofgod" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Wednesday, December 17, 2003 5:12 PM
Subject: Re: GOD Puts the Lonely In Families
> Hey, Carol
>
> I know you and probably most other folks on the list want to beat me for
still whining on this subject so I promise this will be my last note on it,
at least publicly. If anyone wants to comment privately I'll be glad to
respond but don't want anyone else getting sick over the holidays because of
me. Smile.
>
> If you remember, a while back I asked whether it's Scriptural to seek a
wife. It seemed to be to me, but then as others noted there are Scriptures
that say to not seek a wife and be satisfied in whatever state you find
yourself. Most of the list responses seemed to say not to seek (use dating
services, etc.) but wait for it to happen. A year ago that would have been
no problem. But since waking up from a 3-day coma last year I've felt old
and depressed as if there is no more open horizon as I'd thought. (I really
had this thing in my head that the LORD would keep me around until the
Rapture.) Now I don't know what I think. So I haven't been actively
seeking and haven't been taking up any of the offers that have come my way.
>
> Bottom line is that I had an "I know that I know" the LORD would provide
before, and that I had a while to let the process work. Since last year
I've been grieving the loss of the possibility of finding my True Love,
Besherta as they say in Hebrew, Soul Mate. As you can tell from my notes
it's not fully resolved yet, but I'm getting there. And I know now that
I've got to trust myself more instead of saying "Well, I won't even try
because she's not my ideal" and give those who are interested a chance where
I was afraid before of getting involved with the wrong one and hurting them
or myself or dishonoring the LORD. In other words, I was trying to guess
the road conditions miles and miles away while still in my cocoon of a
house.
>
> So I'll keep on keeping on and keep my whining to myself. Meanwhile I'll
keep open to what comes instead of being too quick to judge them or myself
before even giving myself or them a chance. Smile.
>
> Paul
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: carol pearson <[log in to unmask]>
> Sent: Dec 17, 2003 6:37 AM
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: GOD Puts the Lonely In Families
>
> Brother Paul,
>
> <SMILE>
>
> I'm writing again on this and want you to know how much I love you and my
> heart goes out right now because I know the pain you feel on this one!
>
> Now, two things that come to my mind today - and these are different from
> the last time, so please read to the end . . ..
>
> First, remember that you're now in the "family of God" and this is a
> wonderful thing! You have a new Heavenly Father and lots of us brothers
and
> sisters - and we're all going to tell you a pack of little fibs about how
> much chocolate we eat, so you may as well get used to us! <GRINS>
>
> Do make the best of all your Christian family because we're there to share
> with you and to support you too when needed.
>
> The other thing may cause you to hold up your hands in horror screaming
> "I've done that", or you may want to think some more on it. So far as
many
> of us are concerned, it's the man who does the "going and getting" and the
> woman just "waits to be asked"! Now, you "go getter", what are you doing
> about finding yourself a "sweetie"? You have to ask her out, talk with
her,
> be friends first and all that! If she's not in your church, what are
doing
> there all the time and not going to other Christian events/churches to
look
> for her?
>
> I do fully understand (more than you think) how hard you may think this to
> be; but not everyone is looking on the outward (praise God) and you
really
> do just have to be "full of the Spirit" and those who are like-minded will
> be attracted! Of course, those who love chocolate may also be attracted,
so
> long as you share it with them! <SMILE>
>
> Finally, I'm praying again . . . because nothing has worked so far and we
> have to get you through this one somehow or other - and we will!
>
> In Him:
>
>
> --
> Carol
>
>
>
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "lion ofgod" <[log in to unmask]>
> To: <[log in to unmask]>
> Sent: Wednesday, December 17, 2003 2:26 PM
> Subject: GOD Puts the Lonely In Families
>
>
> > Hey, Matt
> >
> > I think you hit on exactly what my obsession about a sweetie is all
about.
> Mine was a very dysfunctional family as they say. A lot of nasty stuff
> growing up which my brothers and sisters have never come to grips with and
> I'm the one who tells the truth, so between that and being a Christian, a
> totally different creature from them, they want nothing to do with me.
Add
> to that they cheated me out of my mother's inheritance (which she only
left
> out of guilt, but that's another long story. Smile.) Anyway, my point is
> that yes, the LORD lets folks marry so we can form families of our own, as
> you say. As Scripture says, He puts the lonely in families. That's what
> I'm hoping (there that word is again) for, but it's not happening.
> >
> > For those of you who will encourage me to make amends with my family,
I've
> tried, it's not from my side. We're told "as much as is in your power" to
> be at peace with others, but sometimes it's beyond your power and the
toxic
> nature of their lives is too poisonous an atmosphere to be in.
> >
> > Paul
> >
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: Matt <[log in to unmask]>
> > Sent: Dec 16, 2003 10:25 PM
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Subject: Re: job maybe?
> >
> > It is depressing when people don't welcome us as we expect they will.
> > However, it is comforting to note that we marry to form our own family
and
> > that as soon as we do marry everyone else, including our parents,
> > grandparents, brothers and sisters, cousins, aunts and uncles and
> > grandparents immediately take a backseat in priority.
> > TV and such has perverted the idea of marage. It used to be put across
> that
> > when a wife takes a husband, she is like a child who in her weakness has
> to
> > train under her mother-in-law to learn how to serve her husband or
> something
> > like that.
> > My wife tried this approach and found a poor sorce of information in my
> > mother. hahahahahaha
> > Likewise, I could not have learned the things needed for me to know from
> > Terri's family in how to care for her as they had screwed up
relationships
> > as well.
> > The men in her family more or less told me that marage is hell and you
> just
> > have to deal with a life of unhappyness as that was what they were doing
> and
> > the women just tried to manipulate me and/or teach Terri how to
manipulate
> > me to get what they wanted from us and for Terri.
> > This is why the bible says that you leave your families and cleave
> together.
> > Well enough preaching from a father who has a screamming child just now.
> > Instituting a new 9 o'clock bedtime with bottle until asleep and then
> taken
> > away as not to rot the teeth so that maybe we can work on this sanity
and
> > marage thing.
> >
> > Matt
> >
>
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