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Reply To: | Go preserve a yurt, why don'tcha. |
Date: | Mon, 23 Oct 2000 15:28:56 EDT |
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The following are from notes taken from my preservation journal; they tell
about home life with the little pirate Mary in my all too brief home time
with her....take a minuet in leisure to read the best is to download to
printer to read later...best Michael..
PS the boat is off Rhode Island ready to go...after 3 months away Im not sure
I am going to go....I will know in a week. in the meantime here is a reason
why... here is Bumpity bump
Bumpity-Bumpity-Bump
The rugged coastline of my hall way is littered with the floatsom of raid and
invasion by a dirty kneed rag - a - muffin
who sails by the door of my study in lace diapered derrier flying the jolly
roger of mischief.
BumpityBumpity-Bump
Her immediate mission is to terrorize of the docile dogs Thelma and Louise
whose sleep is not to be ...
Bumpity Bumpity-Bump; with sleep not to be
The tiny raider pummels those knees in quick unison and falls on the hapless
mutts with squeals of delight mauling them with little hands and outbursts
of cheery bavado before coming away with purloined handfulls of dog hair;
and a sporting a well licked hairdo .
Bumpity Bumpity -Bump.She makes way under full sail
.With the opposition neautralized to submissive groans .the tiny raider now
focuses on the more pleasing plunder pass the pilliars of Hercules The
screen porch.
Ahh ...the screen porch.!
Like mystical Alba
a raiders heaven..a tiny pirates paradise.
rich in nocturnal bugs laid still in the morning cold .
There is easy floor pickings to be had and a shmorgrasborg of still
sputtering lunar moths.Not to mention miles of hidden .coastline under
stuffed chairs and a gaudy chez lounge to gum on.
Yes the Porch ! if she could make that undetected she could adorn her self
with small potted plants and live freely among the dust bunnys while
ingesting friskies from the cats bowl in an island paradise
...Yes Yes On to the Porch!
Bumpty Bumpity Bump
and slam goes the screen door.
And just where is Daddy/
Where is the nations defence ? Daddy is asleep on the fainting couch Asleep
in the false security of his Maginot line of blocking pillows and kitchen
pots..Asleep in his supiority Asleep ..the big oaf is asleep and the world
trembles
BUMPITY BUMPITY-BUMP
The tiny pirate wastes little time and sets to work unleashing her zeal
and zest on the soft targets by sinking the friskie bowl and spreading its
contents to the four corners...next after having a munch
she moves in on the the little potted plants tumbling them over into islands
to trod over.and pull apart
..Drunk with victory now she is a moveable mess of camouflage friskie and
petunias...
Ahhh...but the porch holds bigger prizes . Her raiders eye falls on
.the big watering bowl and she clicks her gums in celebration of the two
new teeth that invisibly guide her.
She heads out going Bupity Bumpity Bump
Capturing it could upset the whole balance of peace in the west wing
It could destabilize canine and feline relations ..and provide endless
theater of changing wet clothes into dry ones by Daddy;
a goal surely worth the risks..
.yes a...a tiny raider could live well there....well indeed
Bumpity Bumpity -Bump- ramming speed
She makes her break for it in a sudden flurry of quick bumpity bumps
this time clutching by one hand her faithfull ally..the well washed Fuzzy
Bunny.
. Intelligence knows Fuzzy Bunny by its one blue button eye.
Infact anymore washings and the eye is history...just a rattle in the dryer
cycle.
inteligence knows not where she picked up Fuzzy Bunny proably when she passed
laundry island but we are not sure; it could have been toy box rock .
Bumpity Bumpity -Bump
Tiny raider is scooting at a good 10 knots in an around furniture and
nicely making way by navigating through the chair legs wearing only one
sock.(yellow) reddening those pudgy knees with frighfull abandon all the
while with fuzzy bunny
in tow.
Bumpity -bumpity -bump -bump..slam-bang
she makes the open sea lanes of the wrap around porch and passes my radar
window as a fast moving shadow of no consequence.
Intelligence is low this morning ....we had a briefing at 4:30 am over a
warm bop-bop(bottle) and quite frankly I am full of no coffee and the sound
of the screen door was picked up as just one of the dogs nosing open the
door as usual.
No big deal...just a dog on the porch...I continue my snooze
Bumpity-bumpity -bump....bang ...crash!.( followed by .squeals of delight)
This time all alarms are sounded....all bells Full alert (sound) .ahh-oo-ga
---ahh-ooo-ga.! ..I scramble from my fainting couch to battle command and the
ships bridge.
An aerial search reveals a trail of strewn tissue paper and portions of
dicarded friskies ;mixed with potting soil heading south into the deep
waters of the porch.
Still much to the raiders credit there is no visual contact made of either
her or her willing dupe Fuzzy Bunny....
The porch is eerily quiet...sonar waits for the slightest move...the tension
is mounting...we luck out
...Sonar indicates an area of happy gurggles punctuated with tiny rasberrys
emmiting from the far porch end.
The rasberrys are paticulairly annoying to a seasoned hunter.They suggest the
intelligence and craftyness of the raider.
An all out sweep search is made of the stuffed chairs before targeting the
chez lounge with the chintz cabbages as the raiders submerged redoubt.
More rasberrys indicate the raider is refueling perhaps with friskies as
Fuzzy Bunny appears briefly then darts under the back part of the
upolstery....
Then all is quiet ..
.it appears there will be a waiting game....
the hunter and the hunted...as moving the couch is too dangerous .
we are spellbound in silence..
If I go right she darts left .....if I go right.... she scoots right.
..stand still I get the rasberrys....
I am check-mated by a pretty pawn..
The porch appears serene ;It is a beautiful fall morning and the sunlight
dapples the chintz.under the turning gold and red leafs outside..
Time is running out..for the leafs and for daddy..
."Peanut" I call ..".Peanut surrender now and things will go easy for
you"..I know the DA....Surrender now and things will be just as before...I
promise...
Nothing doing .
A wee little head pokes out and makes eye contact with big blue eyes
....the game is up Peanut...
....or is it?
No dice... there is a sudden forlorn look to the porch corner.right. and .the
position of the couch prevents me from grabbing her.
"Peanut"!!!!
It's too late.... still clutching Fuzzy Bunny she makes mad dash for one of
the most unattainable prizes of the porch.... the 3 day old pan with the
tidy cat.litter.
.Now there is a prize calpable of bringing down life as we know it..
Its a race against time.
Should she reach it before me and crown herself in it
it would not only throw the whole morning in chaos and turmoil ;
it would reduce Daddy in naval ratings of a swab and render him persona non
grata by the fleet admiral( Mommy)
There would be days of comunity service to atone for and worse yet a general
reduction in rum ration.
Not Daddys cup of tea.
ITo make matters worse the fleet admiral has pulled into the driveway with
the joint chiefs of staff (the mother in law) in an un announced visitation
of the fleet.
These are grave times with grave consequences.
There is precious few seconds to act before your name is mud.
Despert; Daddy's mind races as immediate action is called for
Bumpity bumpity bumpity bump bump...
She passes the water bowl ; whew (thank=you Jesus) and bee lines it
the little pirate has the jump on Daddy and is scooting down the porch wall
like there is no tommorow.....Daddy who fears that no tommorow will be what
he will face should she make the litter pan..quickly recalls his nimbleness
as a high school infielder and high steps it in double time to just catch
the pudgy legged pirate with outstreached hand on the pan.
It was a briillant piece of foot work worthy of the world series
In one fell swoop Daddy caught both pan and pirate on the fly just in time to
waltz her out the screen door; dump the pan in the trash; then turn , dust
her off and greet the morning visit with breathless apolmb while shouldering
his prettty prize in wiggling wonderment. The fleet admiral and joint chiefs
were pleased by the giddy reception and took the rascal under wing with
praise for Daddy and his diligence .Until next time ..Michael...all rts 2000.
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