In a message dated 4/24/00 4:14:33 PM Central Daylight Time,
[log in to unmask] writes:

<< Have any of you experienced anything close to this level of rudeness in
the working world? >>

Heidi,

School of hard knocks has it's own means of sorting people and as it pertains
to construction industry in general it is usually not rudeness that one has
to deal with as much as undisguised psychological brutality. It is a part of
the hardcore builder's tradition, the NY tradition some may say, a twisted
and sadistic machismo, to treat people like shit, expendable resources --
either because the person doling out the treatment is insecure in themselves,
quite often the case in the end, or from a fucked up idea that tough love
improves the quality and durability of the subject. I've been well trained in
the kill or be killed mode of project management, been there, done that -- it
is how a lot of stuff gets built in dense urban environments, and why people
say construction is a "tough" business or that if you can make it in NYC you
can make it anywhere -- simply put, if you've been through enough blood and
manure a little bit more won't hurt so bad. I consider that I was well
prepared with a childhood that hardened a stubborn resolve to subvert and
prevail against assholes. It is my deliberate, and I need to constantly keep
reminding myself, desire to not practice and propogate negative behaviour in
my life. I don't always win out over myself. It may or may not be so easy for
Stern, I don't know, not having encountered the guy, but I'm more curious
than before since the gripes on BP. What I imagine is that he is a product of
his environment and testes as much as any of us and that he may not be able
to help himself, may not be strong enough of an individual, not saying
lacking in strength of ego, but not strong enough to understand and/or change
himself or to see any other way to behave within the strictures of what he
sees as his, and his wife's, professional career. I prefer not to talk about
the specific assholes in my life for fear they may find a way back into it --
I have this ingrained concept of a super-asshole lurking in the corners of
the psyche just waiting for one more shot to knock us down. It is often
difficult for me to deal with people in business and keep my head clear for
the internal problems I carry as baggage from surviving the sorting system --
a process that does not have the formality of giving anyone a clue as to what
day the big reckoning is scheduled for. The histo presto industry by
comparison to the general construction industry is a relatively peaceful
sanctuary. I advise all young people to go to school, it is easier and less
painful to endure.

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